by Jeremy Rutherfurd

Created on: October 23, 2008   Last Updated: May 09, 2009

A family moves to a new town and the father, who shares child-care duties with his wife, makes an effort to meet other parents and set up a play date for his toddler son. He discovers the local Mommy & Me Meetup Group Web site and signs up, and begins receiving regular emails notifying him of upcoming get-togethers.

With both the father and mother working different schedules, he finds it hard to make the play dates, but finally, after a few months, is able to fit one in. He goes online and adds his name to the list of attendees.

He then gets an email from the group telling him not to come.

Sound odd to you in this day of stay-at-home dads and female CEOs? It's a true story. The place is Surrey, British Columbia, and the father is Rick Kaselj. ("Moms club to Surrey dad: we 'hate to discriminate, but...," Surrey Now Online Oct. 14, 2008).

The play-date group: The Cloverdale Mommy & Me Meetup Group.

The email Rick received from the group read in part: "I hate to discriminate, but hope you can understand when it comes to the security of our children and especially since you have not been able to attend a meetup." (From the Surrey Now Online article.)

Jennifer Grenz, the original creator of the Cloverdale Meetup group, posted a long comment on the at home dad Web site saying she was "horrified" by the new organizer's decision to exclude Kaselj.

"My original vision for the group was that it be a PARENTS group," she wrote. "I wanted the group to include all parents because I have met and befriended a number of dads that stay home with their kids."

With regard to the note on the Cloverdale Mommy & Me Meetup Group Web site (which has since been taken down) - "This Group is specific to moms only as requested by a majority of its members" - Grenz wrote that "a poll went out to the group regarding this issue," however, "the poll was confusing as it had multiple questions and not one that pointedly asked whether dads should be allowed in the group with a yes or no answer."

She went on to say that she is planning to start up a new group that will "include all parents" and attract "forward thinking people."

The at home dad site reported later that Kaselj and Grenz are working together to launch this new play group.

In defense of the Cloverdale group's decision to ban men, Amanda Carkener, a member of the club, sent an email to Surrey Now Online talk about the things we went through during our pregnancies, our postpartum bodies and minds among various

• 1
• 2
• Next Page >>