by Jeffrey A. Moore

Created on: October 23, 2008   Last Updated: November 26, 2008

The mere fact that you are reading this article demonstrates your concern about talking sex with a preteen. And you are far, far away from being alone with your concern. It is not easy explaining the birds and the bees to a young child, but you can rest assured that if you don't do it, somebody will. Children need to be informed before they get themselves into a precarious position unprepared. Who better to do it than their parent or guardian? Reading up on the topic is a great way to learn tips and ideas to explain what sex is and the precautions that should be taken.

Listed below are a few things to be considered:

~Make the child feel comfortable. Tell them it's OK to talk to you about anything. You don't have to try and be their best-friend, just let them know it's OK and you understand. Allow the child to ask questions in turn and be sure not to jump to conclusions. All children are curious.

~If there is a moment when a friend or family member is pregnant, take advantage of the situation. Ask them if they know how a baby is made and where they come from. Remember not to make it too uncomfortable, though. If you get the feeling the child is getting uncomfortable, back off.

~There are always moments on Television when a couple is having sex. This is another opportune time to break the ice. Watch the child to see their reaction first. You can generally see if they are embarrassed, because they'll look at their fingers or around the room somewhere. Their mind is till working on what they saw on the T.V., though. Children process more than most adults realize.

~When giving answers always be direct and honest. Explaining the differences between boys and girls is a good place to start with that. Words like penis, vagina, and breasts are common words naming those areas of the anatomy. You and the child will both feel more comfortable once that is out of the way. Try not to be too vulgar with your answers, either.

~Take steps. "Rome wasn't built in a day," they say. The facts of life should be explained in increments, too. Don't be too over bearing in your discussions. Let the child ponder bits and pieces and they will start to come to you with their own questions making it a more comfortable situation on you both.

~If you honestly can't answer a question, make it an event to find the answer. With the seemingly endless information on the Internet you are sure to find the answer somewhere. Look for the information yourself first, though. You never know what might pop up on a Web search regarding sex. Some things children are just not meant to see.

Research is a key component to quality information. Take the time, your child is worth it.

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