by Willow Lissette

Created on: October 23, 2008   Last Updated: October 30, 2008

What are the red flags in a relationship? When should you be alarmed that things are not quite right? When can you tell enough is enough?

There are several red flags that we should discuss.

-If your partner seems distant or hesitant about answering questions a bell should go off. Something isn't quite right and your partner might be hiding something. If you suspect that your partner is hiding something try to talk to them about it and listen to him/her.

-Signs of aggression is another red flag. If your partner suddenly becomes aggressive step back and ask yourself is this worth it. If under any circumstances your partner is physically abusive or becomes abusive its time to get out. There are resources to help with leaving an abusive relationship. The first step is going to the police, they can and will help you.

-Jealousy can become a sign. If your partner becomes jealous over you having friends, or spending time with friends, flags should go up. If this happens step back and ask yourself if you are spending too much time with your friends. If you are not, then this is a definate stop sign.

-Insulting or making fun of you. Your partner might pick you you a little, just because its nature, but if it goes beyond playful teasing this is a sign that he could become verbally abusive. Make sure if it does go beyond teasing to talk to him. If he continues this behavior its time to leave.

-Pressuring you to have sex. If your a teen and your boyfriend constantly pressures you to have sex and you are not ready this is a red flag. Make sure to tell him no, no means no, it doesn't matter what he says. If he continues to pressure you and you do not want to its time to have a talk. If he doesn't listen to you he doesn't respect you.

The bottom line is you need to respect your partner and your partner needs to respect you. If there is no respect at all, its time to think about what you need to do to fix this. There must also be trust in any relationship. If there is no trust or respect between the two of you, think about your options.

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