by Susan Lower

Created on: October 23, 2008   Last Updated: October 30, 2008

Don't be afraid to ask for relationship help, such as professional counseling, if one or more of the following behaviors trigger a red flag about the person you're dating. Some red flags can be worked out through good communication and understanding, like being antisocial at your family's gatherings. Perhaps the person is just shy, but it's important to find out.

Here is a list of red flags in a relationship you should be cautious of:

1. The person you are dating never invites you to their home or to meet their friends and family.

2. You have caught them lying, cheating, or manipulating other people or situations.

3. They appear to be becoming more insecure, guilt driven, or lack confidence in their abilities as an individual.

4. They have no disregard for rules, laws, or etiquette. (Your mother would be appalled by their manners).

5. The more dates the two of you spend together, the more control they think they have over you.

6. They never will give you a straight answer, and they don't ever seem to want to commit to anything more serious than the next date.

7. One day they're hot and the next day you're cold from the frequent mood swings.

8. It's never their fault, they always blame others for their problems, and most of the time they blame you.

9. They are a total slob and have no sense of personal hygiene.

10. Whenever you are talking, the interrupt you routinely. They change the subject to themselves, or correct your speech in front of others.

Today's dating scene is no different than that of a contact sport. Any good sports player will tell you, the more plays you run, the better chance you have of scoring, and the increased chance you have of getting hurt.

There may be perfectly good explanations or situations for any of the red flags mentioned above. When you're in a relationship and the red flag sails, remember to seek professional advice or walk away, even if it is temporary, until you are certain about the future you and this person have in a relationship together.

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