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Identifying and ending a toxic relationship in your life can be a difficult and painful process. The world is not always a black and white place. People are not all bad or all good. Relationships are as unique and complex as the people involved in them; and after you invest time and energy into a relationship, it can be very difficult to know how to let a relationship go. The pain of ending a toxic relationship, however, is far less than allowing yourself to continue a relationship with a person who is toxic for you.

Growing up my mom always encouraged me to go towards the things that are 'life', and shun the things that give you a feeling of 'death'. I have found this to be invaluable advice. The word 'toxic' is defined as: "1. Of, relating to, or caused by a toxin or other poison" or "2. Capable of causing injury or death, especially by chemical means; poisonous" -dictionary by Farlex

Choosing to remain in a toxic relationship is like choosing to continually drink poison over and over again. In a sense it causes injury and death - maybe not an obvious physical death, but eventually emotional pain manifests itself physically in one way or another. Our bodies are connected with our minds and emotions, and physically our bodies will act out what is happening to us on an emotional level. The proof of this lies in anxiety attacks, depression, insomnia, and a myriad of other health issues relating to emotional stress. Stress is a proven to be dehabilitating state. Only a person with a death wish would choose to pick up a bottle of bleach and start chugging. So why is it that so many of us choose to spend time and energy on relationships that are toxic to our bodies, not to mention emotionally and spiritually draining? A lot of times, it is simply because we do not know how to end the toxic relationships in our lives.

The first step to ending a toxic relationship is identifying that the relationship is indeed toxic. Ask yourself these questions:

How do I feel when I am around this person?

Does this relationship make me feel life or make me feel death?

Do you have a heightened level of stress when you are around this person?

Do you feel exhausted when you are done spending time with this person?

Am I giving to this relationship much much more than I am getting in return?

Is this relationship in balance?

If the answer is yes to most or all of these questions then the indications are that this relationship is toxic for you. In other-words this is a relationship that is not LIFE

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