by Jennifer Parker

Created on: October 22, 2008   Last Updated: October 30, 2008

Woman really don't want to waste time on a man that isn't right for them, which is why we are all on the lookout for red flags in a relationship from the very start off. It won't come as a supprise to any of you ladies, that most men just don't know how to deal with emotions. Faced with the decision to either be a man and end a relationship or drag you on an emotional rollercoaster, have you second guess every word and action they make until your head is in a spin, most men would pick the latter. It isn't because they enjoy causing you heartache and confusion, it is simply down to the fact that they are emotionally inept.

Although every relationship is unique, red flags are quite universal. There are the more obvious flags such as, he hasn't called you, he never pays the bill, you find another girl in his bed etc. Then there are the more subtle ones like he won't discuss "feelings" with you or you find him uninterested in the bedroom department. You can always think of a million other reasons why he might be behaving in this insensitive manner but the fact remains that he is being insensitive. If he thought you were worth it, he would make the effort to be clear about his feelings regardless of what else is going on in his life.

The trouble with looking out for red flags, and we all do it, is that it can lead you to scrutinise every detail. The more failed relationships you have, the more you are on the look out for signs that the next one isn't going to work out. It is in effect, self-preservation, and no one can blame you for not wanting to get hurt. Just don't let it turn into paranoia!

It is down to you to respect yourself enough and to trust your instincts when these warning signs surface. All you have to rely on is how you feel, as that is the only thing you know to be certain. If you feel your man is giving you red flags then he most likely is. Don't question that judgement of yours, if you don't feel like his heart is in it, then cut the cord. If he was at all serious about you he will be running down the street, hot on your tail, begging you to give him another chance!

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