by Sherri Garrett

Created on: October 21, 2008

I can't believe this subject would even be debated. The definite answer is to walk away. I have always hated myself for what I am about to say but I am a professional at this subject.

My abuse started as a child through my father. Growing up with it made me feel like it was just part of life so I married my high school sweetheart who did it to me as well. 4 years I took this until he almost killed me-then I walked away. Next came a alcoholic who again physically, mentall, and emotionally abused me to no end constantly. Again the cycle kept going. I finally left after 2 years of that. I decided to get help and went to see a therapist. He told me it was my choice to stop the cycle or die from it. He said I could either stay in the situation and hope he could change or walk away. I walked away.

Years later after regaining my trust again in men-I remarried. For 12 years I was with one of the most amazing men in my life. He worked with me through the little quirks I had from abusive relationships-having tons of patience with me over and over again. He never gave up on me. Years it took me to heal and when I did he was diagnosed with lung cancer. It spread rapidly with chemotherapy he passed in 3 short months. I decided 5 months after his passing and a promise to him that I once again would find love. I again found that stupid cycle and dated the wrong man. This abuse was worse than any I had ever felt in my life. You see they catagorize different types of abuse and I always ask my self why.

I have learned it always starts with emotional abuse to see how far they can go. Then it moves to physical, mental, and sexual abuse. And they always use some type of addiction to tell you thats why they are doing it so you can feel sorry for them and forgive them for their wrongdoing. I barely escaped my life on this one and the only reason I did was because he actually thought he had killed me. I will never in my life forget the look on his face-the cynical smile-the look of satisfaction.

Since then I have semi-healed and found a love like my late-husbands. It is a beautiful relationship-full of trust and healing. This will be a last venture for me. I will never look for love again.

So you have to make the choice-no doctor, no therapist, no family member or friend can make it for you. And if you ever question if you are strong enough just remember-you endured hopeless amounts of things you had to overcome to stay there.

It has made you tough and strong to go out in this cruel crazy world and there is no looking back only forward-I guarantee you'll have a rough road but in the end you'll find yourself in a better place.

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