by Mereshia De Nobrega

Created on: October 21, 2008

We all need love. We want love. We crave love. We want to love someone - anyone and to be loved back. Perhaps we have been without love for so long. Then you meet you match that you believe will be the right one. He loves you and he tells you what you want to hear, but 8 months into the relationship it starts to go wrong. He tells you you are getting fat but you both laugh it off. Then the dress he met you in doesn't fit any more and you want to try new things.

Yes 14 months together now - are you still happy and in-love? Let's see now how that love changed you:

*You haven't been out for dinner for over 12 months.
*You spend all your time at home.
*You don't dance any more.
*You lose contact with friends.

In my case, family BBQs every Sunday became a thing of the past. My love likes to stay in bed till late and watch sports on tv all afternoon, while I bring the snacks. I have not worn any of my sexy clothes for a long time nor worn make-up for about 8 months. I look like a clown in make-up. How do I know? ... because my love told me so.

I have stop walking with a swing I'm not a model and never will be. How do I know? because my love told me so. I have to learn not to laugh out loud. It sounds cheap the same laugh that made him look twice when he heard it the first time. Now I have stop talking so much as well because apparently I don't know what im talking about. How do I know? because my love told me so.

I was alone and happy. I had friends that loved the way I dressed, walked, talked, laughed and danced. If my make-up was good or bad or the lipstick got on my teeth it was okay. My Sunday's were great with my family. We laughed, we sang and we drank and goofed around. We fought, we hugged and kissed and had a great time, but I wanted love and I prayed for a man to love me, touch me, kiss me and look at me and say I look great.

I wanted a man to meet my friends and like them. I wanted a man to spend time with my family and laugh with them. I wanted a man that can walk beside me and be proud of the way I look, dress, walk, talk and laugh, but instead all I got was a man that was lazy that found too many faults in me that criticized everything I stood for. All I got out of this was to be more unloved, more lonely and more sad. And now I have no friends, no family, no self-esteem and no spark. Well tonight my love will find his bags outside and I will find myself, my spark, my family, my friends and my life I'm going to take it back. Because I had it all along without him

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