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doing. I was out "whoring" or who knows what all, according to her. Mostly, I rode my bike to friends' houses to stay away from her and my step mother. I was resentful of my step mother, not because I thought she was trying to take the place of my mom, but because she would frequently do things that would embarrass me. One incident I can remember clearly. We had a dog that my dad had taken from a friend of his because he was abusing it. This dog did not like people outside of our immediate family, although it had attacked my grandfather twice and me once before they had the dog put down. The dog was not allowed inside the house when I had company, however my grandfather had had many mild strokes, and forgot. He let the dog in while I had four friends listening to my records in my room. The dog burst into my room and started barking and growling, scaring my friends. They started screaming and crying, and with a lot of force, I managed to get the dog out of my room. My step mother had been in the shower getting ready for work when the screaming had started, and she ran into my room without covering herself and yelled at my friends for screaming at her dog. They were never allowed in my house again, not that I would have invited them anyway.

My dad and step mother had a friend that had "adopted' them as her parents. She had a little boy and needed someone to watch him frequently. As I was old enough to do so, I started watching Josh when he was ten months old. For four years, I had him more than she did. In that time, she had two more kids, Destiny and Owen. When Josh was four, he told his mom he wanted to stay with me, because in his mind, i was his mother. Frequently I would have them from mid afternoon til the early morning hours. Many times my dad and step mom would volunteer me to watch them without checking to see if I had plans. I put a stop to that when I was sixteen, telling them if they didn't ask me if I was available, then they could take the night off work to watch them instead.
By this time, although I stayed away from alcohol, I was experimenting with Marijuana and smoking cigarettes. I wanted to fit in with my friends, and I found that smoking weed numbed me from the anger and depression I was going through at home. When I was eighteen, I got involved with a man twice my age who sold weed. At nineteen, I moved in with him and shortly after became pregnant with my oldest child. I quit smoking during my pregnancy, however still used marijuana. My

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