by Eugenia Maria Georgescu

Created on: October 13, 2008

When a woman give birth everything changes in her life forever. That woman tries to imagine and plan her life after birth, during the pregnancy. I used to imagine even my baby's face and personality before having my first child. But 1 year and 7 monthes ago when my daughter was born i changed totaly inside. It is a big difference between knowing you will have a baby, the wish of being mother, the imagination of the baby's face and the feeling after birth. When i saw her face for the face time i had a very big surprise. She was so different from what i thought. I could never imagine i will have a child with blue eyes becouse i don't have blue eyes and my husband neither. So when i looked at herface for the first time and kept her in my arms i had such a new feeling. Nobody told me how is it like to love your own baby, what exactly a mother feels. I didn't know how different this new type of love can be. All the rest things in my life went to a second plan immediately.

I know in that day, that new little human being became everything in the world to me. Then, i had a strange feeling that i was the only person able to do things right for me and my daughter and all the others ( my husband, his parents, my mother) were not carefull enough with her I started to see only their bad parts and their bad parts could afect my baby. I used to tell my husband for many times that he hasn't done enough for our daughter, that he wasn't as carefull as i have been. In fact, fighting with my husband all the time was an evident sign of Postpartum Depresion, i was enable too see what kind of husband i have that no other man could bee as good as he is. Now, i think clearly, and i wasn't right becouse he did all he could. The whole family helped me a lot then. I think if a woman's mind is too afected in that fisrt weak after birth, she has to try to repare things after, speak nice with the family and apologies. I told some bad things to my mother too then, i blames her he didn't care enough and that was not true but i was disperated becouse i was to exhausted too tired to narrow mind to see that everyone in my family was beside me then. Now i'm happy becouse they all forgot about thet.

Thanks God i have a smart husband that has been very understanding and pacient with me when me and my daughter needed him. I know only a depresion could make me see him different that he is. That was a very difficult period in my life.

Learn more about this author, Eugenia Maria Georgescu.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.