by Morgan Johnson

Created on: October 13, 2008

Americans v4.0: The Kids of the New Millennium

You, I and everyone reading this article are out of date. We are all about to go the way of the ATARI game station and the Pentium 286; useful in their time but woefully behind the times now. Our replacements started arriving at one minute past midnight January 1st, 2000.

Americans came into being nearly four centuries ago. The beta versionAmericans: Pilgrimsset up shop in the northeast testing the concepts of freedom in a world dominated by monarchies. Their experiment succeeded and the v1.0 launch achieved rollout July of 1776, although the completed version didn't hit the streets until 1789.

The initial version of the American program had some inherit flaws because it failed to deal with the issue of slavery. More importantly, it failed to adequately balance the concept of Universal Freedoms with the established social order. Two programs operating in different parts of the nation proved to be incompatible. The result was the tumultuous Crash of 1860.

It took four years to work out the bugs in the system. Vast amounts of resources, property and lives were lost before the next upgrade came on line. The temporary patch, Americans v2.0: Reconstruction proved to be a failure. In fact, many parts of the country reverted to an upgraded version of the old system with the parts about slavery supposedly deleted, but actually the files were renamed (see ref. Share.cropper.south).

The next upgrade actually started in the mid-20th Century with the massive worldwide launch of Americans v3.0: Baby Boomers. The Boomer program had a lot of features designed to address the failing of previous versions; superior communications networks, interchangeable parts, deleting "color-coded" sorting system, and plug & play upgrades.

Version 3.0 revolutionized much of American society. It showed a remarkable ability to innovate. They brought out personal computers, the Internet and cell phones. The nation would never be the same after their influence.

However, the end of v3.0 was signaled with the emergence of their final release, Americans v3.3: Generation Y. This version was come into a world that has always had the Internet; there have always been cable television and satellite hookups. They are tech-savvy, text happy slackers like the teen character Jeremy in the comic strip ZITS.

The new millennium came in with a worldwide party, the Y2K bug fizzle and the rollout of Americans v4.0. Georgia Lynne Marie O'Neil arrived at 12:01 am

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