by Emily Mooney

Created on: October 09, 2008   Last Updated: January 19, 2009

My partner and I were Hillary fans, and when Obama became the clear nominee for the Democratic party, my Partner and I were disheartened. You see, we thought Hillary would support gay marriage, and were unclear about Obama's views. Over the next few weeks, I followed the campaign more closely, my partner, convinced Obama would only support Civil Unions at best, ceased watching entirely.

She was right, and when Biden announced that neither he, nor his Candidate supported the equal right to marriage for same sex couples, I was saddened that someone so forward thinking would allow himself to be so small minded.

Marriage isn't government issued. If Bob and Joe want to file taxes jointly or entrust their dying wishes with the other, what right does the government have to interfere? If Ann and Jamie have a child together, should either of them have to adopt the baby? Shouldn't it be clear that both Moms are the baby's parents?

If straight couples can get plastered in Vegas and tie the knot in a drunken haze, clearly, it's not because marriage is sacred. If straight couples can marry for business purposes: ie: keeping an illegal alien in the country or filing joint taxes after divorcing, then marriage isn't something defined solely by the true love between a man and a woman.

What is it then? Religion is often cited: that the bible or Koran doesn't condone gay or lesbian love, so it must be bad. Neither text allows premarital sex, either though. And that's not illegal.

Civil union is a way to allow the same rights but still point out the differences between "us" and "them." It's farcical, equivalent to segregation in the last century. A marriage shouldn't be for religious reasons, it isn't a financial or business right that only straight people can capitalize on. It is what people do when they fall in love, and decide to celebrate their commitment with their loved ones.

This summer, my partner and I had a celebration in our backyard. We wore white dresses, a minister officiated the celebration, people threw confetti at us, and the flower girl choked up and couldn't carry her flower basket down the isle. We live in TX, though, where our commitment to each other isn't recognized by any government. I can't claim the woman I stood under the arbor with as my spouse even though I swore to love and cherish her in front of our friends and family.

Other countries have swept ahead of our provinciality in the last 20 years, allowing BGLT's to have the same rights as anyone else. Their government focuses on important things, like health care and world hunger. American's look like fuddy duddys, clinging to antique ideals, choking up politics with their small mindedness.

It would be nice to be asked what my wife does. It would easier for Bob and Joe to not worry when one of them is on his deathbed, that the other can hold his hand. It would be right that Ann and Jamie can just enjoy the birth of their child, and not worry about the paper work while seeing their baby open her eyes for the first time. Civil Union isn't the same. Separate but equal wasn't the same for African Americans, either.

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