It's horrifying to think about, but you know they're out there. Around every cyber-corner is a real life pervert, scouring the Internet in search of their next victim. They lurk in chat rooms. They frequent sites geared towards kids. They stalk innocent children, following their online activity to assess their vulnerability and plan their approach.
They'll say whatever they have to in order to befriend the child and gain their trust. They'll lie about their identity. They'll promise lavish gifts, money, and even fame. They'll try to lure your child away by promising him everything he ever wanted. All he has to do is pick up the ticket and get on the plane. Then what? We don't even want to think about that, do we? But we must. If we want to keep our children safe, we have to know what we're trying to prevent. Unfortunately, no child is off limits in cyberspace.
Here are a few tips to ensure your child's online safety:
• First and foremost, be completely honest with him. Remind your child that not everyone is who they say they are. The new, 12 year-old friend they met in a chat room may very well be a 50 year-old man. While pedophiles are typically associated with men, it's important to remember that women can be pedophiles, too. A twisted mind is not biased.
• Keep the lines of communication open at all times. Some subjects may be difficult to approach, but you can't let that stop you from having a necessary discussion. The more you talk with your children, the more knowledgeable they'll become. Let your son or daughter know they can talk to you about anything, at any time. When they do, treat their questions and comments with respect so they'll feel comfortable coming to you in the future.
• Depending on the age of your child, it might be too much to demand they stay away from popular social networking sites such as MySpace and Xanga. You can, however, set stipulations. Let them know how you feel; you want to allow them some freedom, but you're still the parent. As their parent, of course, you want to ensure their safety. Help them create a profile and make sure it's set to private. This way, only approved contacts can access their site. Approved contacts are typically limited to close friends and family. Although complete privacy should never be counted on, a private profile does help to deter any potential predators.
• Make sure he doesn't fill his profile with private information. Even though his page can be set to private, there are loopholes. And let's face it, predators are criminals with criminal minds. If they really want to get in, they will. So the best way to ensure your son or daughter's safety is to limit the amount of information they offer up on the site. A first name is more than sufficient.
• The best way to keep track of their friends, photos, comments and blogs is to set up a profile of your own. When you do this, have your child add you to their friends list. Once you've become friends with your child, you will have access to their site, as well as all of the information they choose to make publicly available on it. This is also a good way to get to know their other friends, and see what sort of activities go on within their social circle.
• Monitor their online activity. Most chat and instant message clients automatically log conversations. Let your child know that keeping the archive current is a must if he wants to be online. Of course nobody wants to spy on their kid. But in today's day and age, it's often necessary. Think of it as more of a safety measure than an invasion of privacy. Windows Parental Controls and User Accounts are built-in features that offer concerned parents tons of options. You can set up filters and restrictions, disable downloads, block or allow certain sites, and even schedule their surf time! It's a wonderful feature and a terrific tool for busy parents.
• Avoid giving him the impression that you don't trust him. That will only make him more determined to do what you don't want him to. Also, don't let your son or daughter downplay the importance of what you're telling them. If your child believes you're overreacting, show him some news articles about Internet friendships gone wrong. Sadly, there's no shortage of them. Yes, it's scary for both of you, but reality often is. Being upfront with your child is the best way to make him understand.
Your child is your life, and his safety is your number one priority. Make sure to let your children know you love them and you trust them - it's everyone ELSE you have to be wary of. This is a valuable lesson not only for online safety, but for life.