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When is a marriage not a marriage

My first marriage went well until one day we both realized we were headed in different directions. We ended as friends, amicably, with the kid's best interest first and foremost. Now I was a single parent and those of us in this position know what a challenge this can be. And, boy, did I make things tougher when I moved 800 miles away from the father who was actually involved in their upbringing. But moving away from the Big City just had to happen for us to survive. Life in the city had made money very tight and worrying about having to have my children live with their dad began to consume me.

I had recently visited my friend Laurie and her husband in the foothills of the beautiful Sierra Nevada Mountains and I fell in love with the area, the small town where people knew each other and a life rich with history. Life was slower, friendships more personable and I knew I had to be there. I knew my children had to be there.

Everything seemed to fall into place for my family to move to this lovely town. I took a lease option on a three-bedroom condo, I hooked the job transfer with my current retail job that I begged for and gratefully accepted the help of friends in packing a U-haul truck. I set about making a new life for myself and my children.

And life was fine. I lived, worked and played in a three mile radius. I had routines set up for mornings, plans for the kids care after school and fresh air with no traffic congestion. For a short time I was peaceful but, as the kids grew up I thought about how nice it might be to share my life with someone again.

A new store manager was about to replace our current one and the thought passed through my mind "wouldn't it be funny if this turned out to be someone special in my life?" When I finally met the new store manager, Jack, I knew there was such a large age difference that I wasn't interested.

Jack, a small crew and I opened the store in the mornings so we often worked together putting up merchandise. We had a nice working relationship and things went smoothly until the day of the "Sailboat". Jack was discussing the finer points of a sailboat vacation he had taken and was thinking of taken a second trip; "would anyone like to go with him? All you need is a toothbrush!" I remember laughing and saying "I have a toothbrush!" I was just trying to be friendly and was joking around, but from that day on he decided he wanted to get to know me better.

I didn't like the age gap at first, didn't like that he smoked and I definitely


Below are the top articles rated and ranked by Helium members on:

When is a marriage not a marriage

  • 1 of 7

    by Chris Dixon

    It seems strange referring to my first marriage, as a marriage at all. In retrospect it really wasn't much of one. My definition

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    by C.V.Rajan

    The validity of marriage has a legal angle and a social angle. What may be a legally acceptable marriage may appear to be

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    by chulya

    We all hope that when we get married it will last forever. But in many cases today it does not. Most times people will say

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  • 4 of 7

    by Bernice Dennis

    A marriage is no longer a marriage if the two were never one.

    Marriage is no longer a marriage when at least one

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  • 5 of 7

    by Susan Malotte

    My first marriage went well until one day we both realized we were headed in different directions. We ended as friends, amicably,

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When is a marriage not a marriage

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