Exactly what is marriage? In the Unites States marriage is a legal contract between two individuals that have specific requirements, costs and legal responsibilities. Some may argue that it is a way for states and the United States government to collect fees and taxes. It certainly is a part of the equation. Legal names may change. Depending on what state you live in you may lose all individual financial holdings as soon as you say I do, they are now shared. The debates over pre-nuptial agreements, same sex marriages, bigamy, and polygamy are on news every day somewhere in the United States. Marriage and divorce are hot topics.

Every state requires a marriage certificate. Each state can dictate what is required for the certificate. You made need your social security card, blood tests and other forms of identification. Its way of collecting fees, assessing taxes and keeping track of legalities of couples.

This seems to sound very cynical and cold, but at its very core without any other history or religious connotations marriage is a legal contract. The contract is between the couple being married and the state.

When you look at the history of marriage it may have been designed originally to pro-create and keep the tribe alive and well. Tribal leaders arranged marriages similar to the way we may breed stock. The purpose was to have healthy children to prolong the survival of a tribe. If they enjoyed each other's company all the better.

Can religion play a part in a marriage? Certainly. There can be spiritual side and commitment to any relationship. Many of the personal vows, aside from the legal commitments, are spiritual and religious in nature. Some may even consider religion the only reason to marry. The declaration and love may be the more meaningful part of the ceremony for the couple.

Choices about marriage and reasoning are very personal. An Atheist can marry a Christian and teach each other love and tolerance. My neighbors have been making it work for over 15 years. They have very different beliefs and have somehow found a way to make their legal contract work well. Religion doesn't seem to play a part in the union, but respect, love and affection are all evident.

My marriage was anything but religious and yet my spritual beliefs dictate the decisions I make in our marriage every day. We stood before a judge and I couldn't even get the "I Do" part right. I said "OK". I can't imagine what would have happened if I had to recite vows and have a traditional ceremony. Wait I can. I would have bailed!

If religion is the core of who you are, it is in your life. If you are not spiritual or religious your marriage could be equally successful. It's about two people with common goals and respect. Everything else is just icing on the cake and taxes to the government.

Learn more about this author, Trenna Sue Hiler.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.

---

Add your voice

Know something about How marriage cannot be defined by religion?
We want to hear your view. Write now!