by Dragos Roua

Created on: January 14, 2007   Last Updated: February 25, 2011

There are no bad or good choices, there are only choices. "Good" and "bad" are just points of view, values that we've been thought since we were kids. And most of the time with a strong emphasis on one's self-respect, If you do good, you'll feel better about yourself, if you do bad you'll feel, well, bad...

There are however, things that needs specific actions in our lives, things that determines our future paths, decisive, ground-breaking things. Those things are so important that we sometimes wish that we could be done them different...

Most of the time, it's about relations. And most of the time it's about failed relations. We seem to have an almost native inability to chose the right person in our environment. Being a friend, a teacher or a spouse.

We are looking for our own reflection in others. And we are imperfect human beings. We are seeking our own flaws, in an unconscious way. And when we met them, our conscious part, horrified about their problems, act like a savior: it's not good for you, leave!

But relations are only indicators, like lights on a street. They are only helping you to see the road, to help you chose your personal path. It's the road that counts, it's the way you chose your destination and follow it.

Choosing your personal path is the real stake here. And mistakes are only roadblocks along the way. We perceive them on the "negative" side, but at their core, our mistakes are nothing but an expression of ourselves. Accepting them, along with the fact that we are not perfect, is the key to overcome them. Our mistakes reflect our shadow, but the shadow is made only by the existence of light.

The bigger mistake of all is to identify yourself with your mistakes. To forget that you are an evolving human being, who can improve his condition continuously. By accepting your mistakes you are making them vulnerable to your acts, they are subject to change and extinction. You cannot really change something that you not accept, right? On the other hand, considering your mistakes accidents will make you repeat them on a regular basis. If it was an accident, and not yourself, well, it will never happen again, right? Guess what, it will happen again, until you accept it.

In the end, being challenged is the only way you can enjoy life. And if we are looking at things this way, we can never make bad decisions, we can only learn.

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