by James Lynne

Created on: September 28, 2008   Last Updated: December 28, 2011

It doesn't take owning a time machine capable of returning us to the 1950s to create family harmony. The same values that endeared us to June and Ward and Wally and The Beaver, still work in today's blended, extended, combined, and reconstituted families.

Harmony is created within the family by developing a vision of what the family relationship is all about - togetherness, mutual goals, mutual support, and mutual respect. Just as each pitch within a musical movement is unique, each member of a family brings unique ability and talent to the composite.

As part of its shared vision, harmonious families celebrate the uniqueness of each family member. Each part, each person is valued as the individuals cooperate in contributing to the unit as a whole.

Real families in Twenty-first Century America are quite different than the Nelsons and the Cleavers of 1950s TV fame. Yet, it is still possible to build harmonious families in today's difficult times, utilizing the same family values of love, cooperation, communication, and respect that we admire in these timeless TV reruns.

Musical harmony depends on the simultaneous use of several pitches, blended together in movement. Family harmony is created in this same manner. Each member of the family brings a unique pitch or personality to the whole. Through collaborative interaction and with focused effort, individuals come together to compose harmonious families in much the same way composers create musical movements.

Communication, the right and the responsibility to share openly and honestly, also builds harmony within families. Since each part, each person is valued for his or her unique contributions and talents, each also has a voice that is respected by others.

Family harmony is developed through the process of valuing not only the family unit, but also each, separate member of the family. It is clear in harmonious families that no one member is more valued than another nor does one have more right to expression than another. The family unit is equal to the sum of its parts.

Love is given to all family members, unconditionally, in harmonious families. Unconditional love is love without strings. It is love for the sake of love. It does not have to be earned. It is not withheld as a means of control or punishment. It is given freely. Harmony is built within families by open and regular expressions of love for all as well as for the family unit.

Respect generates family harmony. Teaching and modeling respect for

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