by Rachel Holden

Created on: September 26, 2008

Although such a simple word with just one syllable, no is one of the hardest words to say for some of us. Whether it be to avoid confrontation, to avoid hurting another's feelings or simply because we are worried of the outcome of what might happen next, dare we let our true feelings be known.

Thinking back to when I was a little girl and right throughout my teens in fact, I can never remember having this problem. In fact I was always the first to let my feelings be known, most of the time with no worry about how it would affect others. This may be due to being so cock sure of everything as I was young and impressionable and of course very nave.

Since turning around 18, something happened in my brain that made me all of a sudden unable to say no. This went for everybody even my Mother and Father who have always taught me to be myself and to do what I want to do, not to be a follower.
Deep down of course I know all of this, common sense tells me to be honest with myself as well as with others, but there in-lies the problem. The ever-increasing difficulties I seem to get myself into all because I find it so difficult to say no!

Take for instance when I was probably about 19. My friends would call me and say hey fancy going to that bar in town?' Instantly I would think to myself oh god I hate that place, I really am not up for this. A very pathetic shall we go somewhere else' would then entail a very persuasive voice on the other end of the phone saying come on, and I would say yes ok then, kicking myself as a say it. Ok this is indeed a menial example, but its not just situations such as this one that I have difficulty in say the N' word.

Even now at the ripe old age of 21 I see no end to this predicament. I am aware that many others suffer from this seemingly silly ailment, and it looks like we will just have to keep going on and on saying yes to things when our brain and sometimes even our heart is screaming at us from inside No No No!
But beware, for one day this could all become to much, and that little all be-it very loud voice inside of us will come pouring out, louder than ever before audible to everyone. Possibly not at the most appropriate of times either, in-fact probably more so at these times.

So keep a handle on it, try it out every so often. Even if its very quietly at first to yourself in the mirror, then gradually as you build on your confidence, the next time somebody asks you to do something, and you really don't want to, just say, and stick to it. It can't be as hard as it sounds right?

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