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you ignored them at your social peril. Water, often scented with rose petals, was always provided for the diner to wash his hands before eating. Sometimes, this was also brought around between courses. No talking with your mouth full; no loud talking, and no belching or burping (from either end!). And, if you did get drunk there was ale and wine in plenty; water was considered dangerous to drink you did your best to hide it.

It's true that fingers were made before forks', and eating with the hands was tolerated. But, it was an inflexible rule, as with modern Muslims, that food was taken with the right hand only. The reason is identical; the left hand was used for sanitary purposes'.

The main course may have consisted of an extravagant dish, such as a great pye', consisting of several layers of different meats. The top layer may well have been live blackbirds, which, as the nursery rhyme tells us, were released when the crust was cut into.

Bread and cheeses either imported or domestic may also have been served. Desserts were usually milk-based dishes, sloppy and extremely bad for your teeth, but sometimes at the close of a meal, or between courses, subtleties' might be brought out.

These could be sweet or savoury; but a golden rule was that they had to be capable of being picked up with two fingers. Surviving recipes mention meat balls shaped like hedgehogs, or decorated to look like miniature pieces of fruit. Other subtleties were douchettes' which might be sweet, similar to a modern custard tart, or made with eggs and bacon, like a miniature quiche.

Another subtlety was a mushroom pie, shaped like a miniature Cornish pasty.

If a tourney or hunting party was planned, the lady might instruct her cook to prepare subtleties. These were to serve out to any friends or acquaintances who might drop by her tent and, once more, the main objective was not to feed visitors, but to impress them.

So, the more imported food she could offer, and the further afield it came from, the better.

The final course, in each case, was, again, designed to impress. It could be that the lord's castle was replicated in pastry, and each turret would have a different filling, of meat, apples or anything available.

Here's the nasty bit. The piece, over which the cooks would have laboured for many hours, was brought before the lord with due ceremony by the head cook and he would cost a pretty penny to employ, too. And, the lord would show his wealth and power by simply smashing the confection.

But, it was shared out afterwards, so it makes a little more sense than piling up a Ferrari to show off your wealth!

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