Home > Parenting & Pregnancy > Teens > Teens (Other)
Created on: September 22, 2008 Last Updated: June 29, 2009
Ranting aside, while a teenager may have raging hormones, that is certainly not enough reason to engage in sexual conduct. Abstinence until marriage is the right thing to do; it is Biblically commanded, and teens, like others, are expected to obey this edict - both by God's Word and parental authority. Lest anyone assume that merely forbidding sex constitutes failing one's children, children should also certainly be taught about the birds and the bees as well as how to prevent pregnancy and STDs if, heaven forbid, they do decide to have sex before they are married.
Many teens look like adults; many act like adults, at least part of the time. This is a very big reason that many parents drop the ball on teenage sexual activity - they provide a child with birth control, they turn a blind eye, they assume that "all" teens are having sex and that there isn't anything they can do about it anyway.
This is not true. You can lock your teen in his room; you can fit her with a chastity belt; you can "guilt" them every second of every day, lecture till the cows come home, and refuse to have any conversation about sex. And you can follow them around 24/7.
But is this really possible? Of course not, it's a fantasy, this is not going to happen - you can't control your kids all the time, forever and ever, amen. Not possible at all and, furthermore, if you think long and hard about this, you've NEVER been able to control your kids at all times. What you can do is teach them, give them information, and let them know how very, very, very disappointed you will be if they have sex before, say, age thirty.
Seriously, you can do all these things. And it might work. Maybe. You could even tell your daughter that she can't date a boy until she first brings him home for a family dinner. That should guarantee some date-free months, if not years.
The problem is that, in spite of adult-like qualities, teens are not fully equipped to make life-altering decisions. They need assistance and guidance. A lot of it. And then some more.
The trouble with trying to control teen sex is that, aside from it being a near impossibility, teenagers do believe that they are capable of making their own decisions. One will frequently hear things such as: "It's MY life", "I get to decide", "You're ruining my life", "But I WANT to", and of course, "All my friends get to do it". Usually these things are said, or shouted, in a state of high emotion accompanied by much drama. This, of course,
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