by John Carter

Created on: September 22, 2008

How to deal with your kids!

The worst thing you can do is lose your head, and start shouting at them. Put yourself in their shoes; how would you like to be screamed at? No doubt you'd bust somebody's head. Kids are the same, and they won't tolerate yelling. The more you yell the worse it becomes, and the more apt you will be to receive poor behavior. This can escalate into out and out violence. You can't really blame the kids; because all they are doing is reflecting back your bad behavior.

There is an old saying that you can drag a horse to water, but you can't make them drink. If this applies to horses it also applies to kids. All to often out of our own frustrations we find ourselves dragging them up to something they don't want and for the most part aren't even interested. It doesn't make any difference what it is, if the kids aren't interested you aren't going to make them interested by yelling or threats.

You have to put yourself into your kids shoes. As far as that goes even the Indians knew better then to judge another until he has worn his moccasins for a month. If it is something you don't like; you can be sure your kids won't like it either. The situation is one similar to the old one that says you can catch more flies with honey then with vinegar.

Any good leader, and that is exactly what you are, knows that praise goes a lot further then criticism. No one is apt to react well under the shadow of criticism. You wouldn't and so it follows shouldn't expect your kids to either. Besides that criticism sends the wrong message to your kids. Take them aside and explain very carefully what is wrong, and at the same time praise them when they do it right.

Obviously, the tactics change as your kid grows older. You have to adapt yourself to meet the challenges presented. As a kid approaches adulthood part of their psych dictates that they are apt to do anything to get their elders mad. Don't feel bad, they even speak of generations of vipers in the Bible. They weren't talking about the kids next door; they were speaking of their own children.

One of the most important things that you can teach a kid is the importance and how to use money. This unfortunately, is a skill that isn't taught in school. Your children are going to have to use this skill throughout their lives. Teach carefully!

It is self evident that kids will be kids, but for as long as they are under your roof you have to keep a modicum of control over them. They are a lot easier to get along with if you don't spend your time yelling and making a complete fool of yourself.

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