by Carrie Neal Walden

Created on: September 13, 2008   Last Updated: July 10, 2011

More Than That

"Amy Martin."

"Hey. How are you?"

"I'm fine. Great! On my way to a lunch, just dropped off this week's articles for my editor. How are you?"

"Good. Last weekend was great. First weekend of dove-hunting season and all, you know. And this week, I've just been working and I have this lunch and client meeting tomorrow. So, I'm good! What's on your agenda this week?"

"What's on my agenda this week? That's what you called to ask me?"

"Well, uh, I mean, what's going on? How's your new place? Are you all settled in?"

"You know, I deleted you from my phone for a reason. And since I didn't recognize your number and actually answered, my first instinct was to be polite. But . . . that's what you have to say to me? What's on my agenda? And how's the new place?"

"I'm sorry I haven't called. I was out of town and just got your email. Hunting, and all . . . "

"You just got the email that I sent you five days ago? The one I sent after the text you got, what, a week before that?"

"Well, I mean, I just had a chance to read it . . . and to get back to you."

"After two weeks? That's all you have to say? You just now got around to responding?"

"Amy, I . . . I'm not ready to be in a relationship."

"You're not what? It's been five months. You met my parents. Which I didn't even know if I was ready for, and you were seemingly thrilled about. And it went great. Then you disappeared."

"Well, I mean, I have fun spending time with you. You're wonderful. And I really enjoyed meeting your parents. But . . . I don't want to be serious with . . . anyone."

"You don't want to be serious with anyone? I didn't think we were. I thought we were dating. And having fun. At least that was the last conversation that we - you and I, both, if you remember, had. When you said 'I'm not seeing anyone else' and 'Yes, we're exclusive,' what did that mean, exactly, if you're not ready to be in a relationship?"

"I just . . . I'm not ready to be serious with anyone. I'm sorry."

"Yes, you are. And at 38, and with two marriages behind you and all, we discussed about what we've both learned from both of our relationships and mistakes and everything . . . I expected better. I didn't want white picket fences and babies anytime soon. I certainly don't need 'A Serious Relationship' right now. I'm trying to get my new career off the ground! But I thought from the beginning that we were clear and communicative. And I don't know what 'we're dating exclusively' and 'I don't want to be in a relationship' means when put together, other than, apparently, nice dinners, texts and occasional phone calls, and sex, and then . . . a guy who thinks it's OK to disappear. Which makes me have to decide whether to pretend not to notice, or call him on it. And you know what? I'm worth more than that. Even if it's not . . . serious."

Learn more about this author, Carrie Neal Walden.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.