by Renee Asher

Created on: September 12, 2008

Many people think that doing something they are not proud of, and having a regret are on in the same. I argue they are not.

In order to truly live without regrets, one must have a certain amount of self awareness. Although a person may make mistakes, possibly even catastrophic ones, it is important to take a step back from these decisions and actions and take stock.

No one reaches the end of their life satisfied by simply existing. Human beings experience things, learn from them, develop their personality and belief systems and go on toward the next life lesson. If one never made mistakes, then one would lead a very shallow and meaningless life. To truly live without regrets it is important to look at the situation from various points of view. You may ask yourself several questions on the road to getting past regret:

1) What did I learn about myself in this situation?

2) What positive things happened becasue of this decision/action? (Example: did you form stronger bonds with friends or family? Did you change location or job and find something better? Were you able to learn something that will help others?)

3)Where am I now (mentally, emotionally, in life) as a result of this situation and what are the positive aspects of that?)

4) Would I change the way my life is now, if it meant that situation would have never happened?

When we do things that we may feel poorly about, it is important to realize that life is a journey, and there is no one path to take. As we make decisions and act on them, we take turns and go around bends that we perhaps would not have in a different situation. Every thing we expereince in life brings us farther along that road. If we waste time on regrets, we are doing ourselves a great disservice by not taking stock of all the things we learned and how much we grew as people.

If one takes the view that life is a journey, and is able to objectively look at the positive things in their lives, it is more than possible to live without regret. Each action and decision leads to new developments and opportunities. Some as simple as meeting new people, or gaining stronger relationships with those we already know, or some things as large as moving to a new area, discovering new things about one's self or discovering that you need to reprioritize your life.

The idea is simple, but putting into practice isn't all that easy. Remind yourself when things get bad "No regrets, only lessons learned".

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