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When I was young and a lot more foolish, I wanted to be remembered for what I thought my friends and family would consider important: education, career and upward mobility. However, over the years, my values have matured with me.

Some ago, I gave my college journalism students an assignment to be in finished in class the first night we met. Show me, I told them, how you want others to remember you. Write your own obituary. You can be a CEO or a saint. Just make sure to use the required structure we had just covered, I reminded them.

Every single one of them did pretty much what I expected them to do. They defined their lives by what they had sought to achieve based on what it was popular to accomplish then. Some of the obituaries made me chuckle because of the obvious exaggeration. I could tell one writer, a freshman, relished every word he wrote. He stated that he had earned a Ph.D. in biochemistry and morphed into a zillionaire a few years later with a cure for all forms of acne.

After I die, I hope that people will remember me for what I willingly gave rather than what I got from life in the way of achievement. I don't want a group of them to linger over McDonald's fish sandwiches at lunchtime, mention my name and then add, "Hey, isn't she the one who won the very first Gotcha Award?"

I don't want to be known for any of the many job titles that pepper my resume. Or for the academic string of initials after my name. Or for the civic groups I headed or the non-profit organizations I helped launch. I hope people will just conclude that I left the world a wee bit better plan than it was when I landed here. And I want them to realize that people who volunteer a lot aren't saints or martyrs. We were just born with a genetic anomaly that lets us shrug off any inconvenience donating our time involves.

I want my husband to remember all the times I shuffled downstairs to pack his lunch even though it was my day off. I hope my daughter will recall, years later, how many times I kept my mouth shut when she wanted to do something really, really stupid. It would please me greatly from wherever I will be watching to know that they recalled I wrote a lot of articles about people whose selflessness inspired others. And about medical developments that might help many of my readers.

Most of all, I hope everyone will remember me as a person who looked at life through the filter of her spirituality and who felt blessed more often than not.

Learn more about this author, Vonda Sines.
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