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and in learning how to carry on without your beloved companion.

HOW COUNSELING CAN HELP

Today, it's not uncommon for people to seek counseling for various reasons. When you've lost a pet, you should feel neither embarrassed nor frivolous in seeking help as well. By talking out your feelings and emotions over the loss, you can learn ways to cope and overcome your grief. It all begins with having an understanding person who will listen to your thoughts.

A pet bereavement counselor is able to help in the following ways:

- First of all, and very importantly, they understand and ensure you that your grief is valid and that's very important to the person who is suffering through a loss.

- They are there to listen. When we lose someone or something very close to us, it's important to talk about the pain and emotional turmoil. This is one of the first steps in learning how to deal with the loss.

- The counselor will allow you to talk about your pet. Often times, those close to us may not understand our need to talk about them or discuss them in any manner. However, just as it is with losing a family member, by talking about them, we lose the fear that we'll someday forget them entirely, lose our memory of them, downgrade the importance they had in our lives. This doesn't usually happen, but for the person grieving, the fear is real nonetheless.

- You will learn to let go of any feelings of guilt. We all have some feelings of guilt when we lose a pet, feeling helpless in not being able to extend their short lives. Or, we may feel guilty that we didn't spend near enough time with them, work and other commitments taking priority. A counselor can help you to understand that you could not possibly devote 24 hours a day with your pet.

- A counselor can help you to move onto the next step of letting go, yet still remembering your pet with fondness.

Talking about our grief, even when we lose a pet, is a major step in overcoming the grief. No one should feel shame in having to seek counseling.

As each day passes, we are able to talk about them less and less, but in the same token, we are able to keep and hold the memory of them with less hurt. There WILL come a day when you can mention them fondly, yet the pain will not be so traumatic. Counseling can help you come to grips with your loss so that YOU are able to live again.

Learn more about this author, Penny B.
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