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as the norm and are accepted in the same way that going into your father's business when you grow up is accepted.

The other reason that arranged marriages last longer, and this is extremely important, is that the expectations of both parties are far lower. Every potential husband and wife in an arranged marriage hopes that his or her mate will be attractive and they will like them, be compatible with them, and perhaps even fall in love with them. Arranged marriages are not necessarily loveless marriages. Romantic love marriages, however, often turn into loveless marriages.

Entering an arranged marriage, you are culturally predisposed to accept your lot. You do not expect to marry prince charming. You only hope that he isn't a frog. And if he isn't a frog, then you feel that you have gotten a good deal. If it turns out that your mate is attractive and you actually like him or her, enjoy being with them, and find sex to be less than objectionable, you are ahead of the game.

And, as I said above, you could actually grow to love one another. In an arranged marriage, you have nowhere to go but up. In a romantic love marriage, couples often start at the top and have nowhere to go but down. The antidote to this is to make sure that you really like your mate, that you enjoy being with them, that you really can see yourself spending the rest of your life with them.

Love can last; romance, not so much. Find someone you like and you will already be ahead of the game.

Learn more about this author, Bob Trowbridge.
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