by Pat Lunsford

Created on: September 10, 2008   Last Updated: December 07, 2009

Infidelity is one of the most difficult trials a man and wife could ever go through. The one who was cheated on carries an enormous amount of pain that only God can fully heal. The images alone are enough to push a person to the brink of insanity.

The guilt of the ones who cheated, if they have truly repented, cuts like a jagged knife to the very core of their being. The consequences could cost them everything that was ever truly important to them. But infidelity isn't something that's easily forgiven and once it's done, it's done.

However, if the guilty parties have truly repented, meaning they honestly regret what they did and sincerely intend to never let it happen again and the one who was cheated on is ready and willing to forgive, the marriage can be saved.

The guilty party must give the spouse enough time to accept what has happened, which may mean giving some distance to deal with the pain and sort feelings.

Nevertheless, infidelity is not unforgivable. According to the Lord Jesus Christ, infidelity is the only acceptable reason for divorce. However, infidelity does not make divorce mandatory. When the adulteress was caught in the act and was about to be stoned, Jesus said, "Let he who is without sin; cast the first stone." One by one they walked away.

Be that as it may, if infidelity happens more than once in a marriage, counseling should be considered first before deciding to end the marriage. Counselors can help couples speak openly about their feelings without being belittled. Sex isn't always the need being filled when one commits adultery. There could be any number of other issues involved that neither party may even be aware of.

Sexual misconduct is sin against one's own body. The sin of infidelity touches the lives of everyone involved such as children and other family members and the healing process can be agonizing. The road to recovery will be difficult but God can strengthen any repentant sinner. "My grace; is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness."

Jesus said that when a man and woman take their marriage vows, "they are no longer two, but one." Those who made their vows before God are joined by God. He can close the rift and heal the pain so long as there is genuine repentance along with forgiveness. Those who were not joined by God should repent, forgive, and make their vows before God. Even if one is a believer and the other is a nonbeliever, the union will be blessed.

"For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy." (1Cor. 7:14)

"What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder." (Mark 10:9)

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