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negative way. It can be a marvelous thing to be able to support each other in a decision to have sex only when you are ready for it and be respected for what you have decided.

Many times, the pressure to have sex usually comes when your teen is already in a relationship with someone. The pressure to have sex with a girlfriend or boyfriend can often be a compelling thing, but it may help to remind them that although they may feel that they are ready to take their relationship to the next level, their partner may not be feeling the same way.

Often enough, if one person is forced or feels obligated into having sex with their partner before they are ready, it can often ruin something really special between the both of them because one or both are not ready for the emotional repercussions that can result from such a liaison.

When all is said and done, if the teen feels that they are ready to have sex simply because they are afraid that they will get "dumped" if they don't, then they should think about how much respect that their partner feels for them and whether they are losing their virginity for the right reasons.

It is important that your teen realizes that sexuality is to do with who they actually are as people and who they get close to on an emotional and not just a physical level.

Advise them to take the trouble to get to know people properly. For example if your teen finds that they have become close to someone on an emotional level and they have now started to fantasize about going 'further' with them then it means that he or she is probably getting ready to take their relationship to the next level.

Many teens make a conscious decision not to have sex until they feel really sure that the time is right for them, and this can lead to positive feelings of empowerment as they establish their own sexual boundaries. Staying a virgin is one of the ways that a teen can show that he or she is confident enough to make coherent choices about his or her own body.

Ultimately, the right time for a teen to have sex cannot be pinpointed to a specific moment. It will come at a time when the youngster realizes that they are in charge of their own sexual destiny and when it comes to the time for them to have sex, it will be based on when it is right for them as an individual and not as a result of unwarranted external pressures and ill judged emotion.

Learn more about this author, Jane Allyson.
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