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The importance of discussions with friends

by Jimmy Nightingale

Created on: September 03, 2008

Over the last 40-50 years, human technical capability has progressed at a seemingly exponential rate. We enjoy economic wealth like never before and economic growth has progressed from predominantly agricultural and manufacturing sectors to services and knowledge. We have a dazzling array of amusements and entertainments at our disposal, from telephones smaller than a pack of cards than can do everything bar make us a cup of coffee, the choice of hundreds of television channels screened in high-definition digital quality and full surround sound, cars that look more like spacecraft, to computers smaller than a phonebook that connect us to the world. All things that probably our grandparents, living in a period dominated by global war and the escalating threat of nuclear Armageddon, would have scarcely imagined in their wildest dreams.

All this progress has come at a huge price. Apart from the self-perpetuating need to consume, an economic machine that continually urges us to upgrade and replace goods that barely last beyond their scanty warranty period and the environmental damage we've inflicted on our planet, a much overlooked cost is the decline of the social networks that served to provide us with perspective and meaning in our lives. We work harder and longer in jobs that are increasingly specialised and removed from face to face contact with our colleagues and customers. The 24/7 pace of modern life and double income families means that friends and relatives are often nothing more than a peripheral or even a conceptual part of our lives. We are becoming an increasingly insular society.

Is this a bad thing? Yes, I believe so. For starters, go back even thirty years and most people knew their neighbours. I certainly did. We knew everyone in our street, what they did for a living, the names of all their kids, what they got up to in their spare time (often things that we were probably better off not knowing!) and it was rare for anyone to have a party or barbeque and not invite their neighbours. It was a community in every sense of the word. People tended to look out for one another, mind pets and kids, have lengthy chats over a side fence or a cup of tea or coffee.

Kids tended to play together. In my case, there was always a game of cricket or football going and we seemed to keep out of mischief. Because our parents all knew each other, if anyone got up to any trouble, there would always be someone around to either dob them in or give the recalcitrant a stern

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