by Tiffany Beltramo

Created on: September 01, 2008

It is a sad yet very real fact that many children have a parent and sometimes two behind bars. Now I agree that a child has a right to visit his or her parent while they are incarcerated. But here is where it gets a little scary for me.
I am the wife of a Correctional Officer. My husbad has been the officer that is standing watch in the visiting room and has seen many families interact on several occasions in the visiting area. Here are the drawbacks that we see. First, they get an initial impression of intimidation during the visitor search process. Then their parent is escorted in in handcuffs, which is a sight that no child should have to see and they are given a chance for brief contact and then have to sit on opposite sides of the table. Some facilities do however allow more contact between inmate and child. I feel that it is very traumatizing to the child to have to see the parent in this situation. Then the family after a few hours has the awful moment of saying goodbye and having to leave and do the whole search process again. If the child is very small, they sometimes get to take a nap in this wonderful setting on a community mattress that has a sheet over it. Then they get some lunch out of the vending machine. Isn't this kind of giving the child the idea that this is somehow normal?

These are not happy places people. There is Hepatitis and MRSA in abundance and that is just the top of the worry list. Then you have the added wory of the child being or feeling intimidated by the officers. Not that it would be intentional, but it could happen. These officers should be individuals that our children trust, not fear. Sure, they should fear doing wrong but not fear the enforcer. Prisons stink, they are dark, dreary, scary and lonely. I think that it is wrong to allow a child a "tour" of that environment. There is no need to have a child in a prison. I also am a caretaker of two little girls whose parents are officers as well. Do you realize that the children's own mother will not even touch them until she has washed her hands and changed out of her uniform? Now that should say a lot. Maybe there is a place for a teen in trouble to scare them straight, but "tours" in my opinion are not a smart idea. Teach the child to respect law enforcement and to respect themselves. Don't give them an inacccurate measurement of punishment. Those doors slamming behind you are a very real and sobering experience, one that my husband says he still isn't used to and still gives him a cold chill. On the flip side, i feel that letting a child tour a police station gives them a secure sense and a true trust of our officers. Let's leave the tours to the ones who deserve to be there.

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