The dating game introduces us to many different personalities and people. The ones to be wary of are those vultures known as "players". Without warning they will swoop in and prey on your weaknesses. Once they have you securely gripped in their talons, your heart will mercilessly be ripped out. You will be left defenceless as they move on in search of their next unsuspecting victim. It's a painful fate to suffer, but knowing how to identify a player will allow you to seek refuge and avoid an imminent attack.
Unfortunately, there is no distinguishing feature that makes it possible to visually identify a player. Your instinct and intuition must be trusted to detect any sign of being played.
Confidence is a good quality to possess, but there is a case of too much of a good thing. A player oozes with confidence, to the point of being egotistical. Their fixation on themselves is blatantly obvious to even the least perceptive in the crowd. The way they carry themselves, whether at a bar or shopping mall, clearly conveys the message, I know I've got it going on. In their mind every woman wants them, and they could easily charm any one of their choosing.
Occasionally a wolf in sheep's clothing will go undetected and blend into the flock. These are the true masters of their craft, but it shouldn't take long for alarm bells to sound, exposing the scoundrel for the fake that he is.
He has your number and can contact you at his leisure. The only contact information you have been given is a cell phone or pager number. This is something you should be questioning, as these devices are with him at all times. Is there a reason he is concerned about you calling his home number, when he may not be there to answer the call? Excuses such as, my home phone is out of service, can only hold up for so long. Reluctance to give out a home phone number is very characteristic of a player.
Spending all of your alone time at your place can be a clear indication of a player at work. So can only being able to see you on certain days. Although he claims to have a home, you've never been there. Possibly it's because there is another woman there. Actually, he may not even have a permanent residence. Some players will just roam about, dividing their time between each of the women they are involved with. Talk about a free ride.
When it comes to players, everything is done for their own personal gain. Although they come across as charming, sincere and caring, the main goal is to find your weakness and use it to their advantage. They will tell you whatever you want to hear in order to gain the upper hand.
Early in the relationship, a player will begin to promise you the moon and stars. He will fill your head with scenarios of the perfect life you will share together, knowing full well he has no intention of ever following through. Disappointment becomes the norm as promises are routinely broken. Eventually, even the most skilled player, will run out of viable excuses. It shouldn't take too many let downs for you to see him for who he really is.
As the life of a player is based on deception, they usually take the opportunity to portray themselves as something they're not. He may claim to run a successful business, be a high profile consultant or even an international news correspondent, depending on which image he has chosen to emulate. There is never any substantiating evidence to confirm his self proclaimed success. This will bring you to the conclusion that the life he wants you to buy into doesn't exist.
With personal gain being the motivating factor in his game, he may begin to ask for loans. He will seem truly ashamed to even have to ask such a thing, but he assures he will pay it back as soon as possible. He may claim to be short on rent while waiting for a big business deal to go through or he just needs a loan until he receives a settlement he's awaiting. The truth is he's out to take whatever he can get from you, with no intention of ever paying it back. Clutch your wallet tight and send him packing.
Your social activities will involve your family and friends. He may claim to have no family or that they live out of town. You won't be included in anything where his friends will be present. It's almost as though he's surrounded in a cloud of secrecy. This is exactly what he wants. Introducing you to anyone who is close to him threatens to blow his cover, and put an end to his game.
Avoiding the clutches of the remorseless vulture is easier when you know how to recognize it's predatory tactics. Rest assured that his feathers will one day be ruffled, as even the biggest player will eventually be played.