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Humor: Fairy tales

by Daniel Cawthorne

Created on: August 29, 2008

Legacy of Love: The Unhappy Tale of Crystal Rose and her Beloved



Once upon a time-what? No, you haven't heard this story before. Yes, I'm quite sure, now quit bugging me!

Now, where was I? Ah, yes!

Once upon a time there was a beautiful princess-I don't care how familiar it sounds! It is original!

Anyway, back to the story, MY story! There was a beautiful princess named Crystal. Now, as most fairy tales go, Crystal was placed under a dreadful spell. She was to fall in love.

To fully understand the reasoning and intent you must go back to when the spell was first cast. The spell was placed upon her by the dreadful Witch of Svendor, her name too dreadful to speak; she is known simply by the Witch of Svendor. Svendor, of course, being the town she resides in. Quite possibly no one knew her name and simply made up the dreadfulness of the seemingly non-existent name. Either way, she was a dreadfully evil character as it seems witches are.

Well, as you know, Crystal is a princess. She is commonly called Princess Crystal. Most likely because she is, indeed, a princess, and her name is, in fact, Crystal. Well, Princess Crystal, being the only daughter of King Lupatin and Queen Meladhrama, was expected to marry and have children so that the lineage of the Rose family (for that was their name) could continue and that the Roses would always have the crown (even though it was a rather uncomfortable crown, as was the throne). As her eighteenth birthday approached, letters and their couriers were sent out throughout the land to other kingdoms. The letters were sent to all the eligible suitors.

On the week of Crystal's eighteenth birthday there was to be a ball. A festive week of eating, dancing, and hopefully meeting someone she was willing to spend the rest of her life with. The first day of the ball came and excitement was rampant in the castle. It is a ball! There shall be food and men! And, of course the men were thinking, it is a ball. I shall have to wear tights. And they were instantly depressed, until they remembered the food anyway.

The evening started out wonderfully, Crystal was enjoying the merriment, and there was no lack of handsome princess or delicious food. When, all of a sudden, it got quite dark, and the doors were thrust open. In rushed the terrible Witch of Svendor. Lightning flashed and she cackled quite maliciously! The guests were in a panic. It was the Witch! At the ball! She could only want one thing; revenge. After all, it was Crystal's parents that exiled

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