by E.D. Cameron

Created on: August 27, 2008

You can play hard to get or you can be hard to get. The only difference is, being hard to get is a lot more fulfilling and honest...and no one really likes to feel "played".

Here are some ways to become hard to get:

1. Get involved! A busy calendar guarantees you are not sitting around on a Friday night waiting for someone to call. Whether its joining a club, joining a gym, doing volunteer work, or simply making dates with friends, keeping busy will enrich your life, your schedule and keep Mr. or Mrs. Right feeling like they need to step up their game to become a priority on your schedule. It also is a great way to meet new people, feel good about yourself, and improve your overall quality of life.

2. Express expectations clearly, and set guidelines for your dating life. Don't accept rudeness, being stood up, or poor follow through on phone calls. This not only is rude, but bodes poorly for the future. Be sure to communicate this to your dates: "I'm not interested in people who are not punctual," or "If I don't hear from you by tomorrow, I can't promise I can see you this week."

3. Put yourself first. Don't rearrange your schedule (whether for a date or a phone call) for your love interest. This shows that you have a strong character and aren't waiting on pins and needles for them to make their next move. Dropping everything to be with or talk to your love interest signals that you have nothing else going on! It also shows that you put others before yourself. Most people are attracted to folks who take good care of themselves (ie "no baggage") mentally, emotionally, and physically. By taking care of your own needs, you demonstrate to your love interest that you are a whole person who doesn't need a romantic interest to make your life full.

4. Be mysterious. A little mystery is good at any stage of the romance, and doesn't have to be convoluted. Like a good book, or good movie, the best way to learn something about another person is to show not tell. It also demonstrates to your love interest that they will have to spend quality time to get to know you.

If you utilize these life strategies, you will not only appear hard to get...but you will be hard to get! Just like anything of value, your love interest will have to work hard to capture you...which means everyone wins! Your love interest feels like they won something of value, you feel positive from someone trying so hard, and to top it all off you have improved yourself by not only playing hard to get, but by being hard to get!

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