by Susan Hibberd

Created on: August 27, 2008

There are always things to consider when you are thinking of dating someone. Do you like the same things? Will you get on with their parents? Will they like your friends? But when you are thinking about dating a single parents, there are even more things to consider.

CHILDREN

The first and most obvious thing to consider is whether or not you will like their children. Obviously, parents are very protective about their children, and if you don't like children of a certain age, then this can be a big problem.

If your prospective date has teenagers, this could be an even bigger problem. Teenagers are notoriously difficult to handle, and are often only loved by their parents until they come out of that difficult phase!

Remember that as the relationship grows you will have to see these children more and more. If you don't like children, then now is the time to move on.

EX-PARTNERS

When someone gets divorced without children, they can put their ex right out of their lives. When there are children involved, the ex-wife or ex-husband will still be around. Because of the children keeping them together, your new date and the ex will still have a strong relationship, and you need to be able to cope with this.

The ex-partner will turn up at the house regularly to collect or drop of the children. He or she will be around for their birthdays, and for Christmas etc. Every time there is a problem with a child, this is the person your date will turn to first. Can you cope with that?

TIME

If a person has children, then they will necessarily take up quite a lot of their time. They will be there all the time, and if they are small, then they will need looking after all the time.

This will infringe on anything you want to do with your new date, and you will have to be prepared to plan things in advance, but also be aware that plans could change the last moment due to Johnny coming down with a cold or Lucy needing to be collected from somewhere.

YOU'LL ALWAYS COME SECOND

The sad truth of the matter is that you will always come second to your date's children. If they call while you are out, your date will take the call and run off if they are needed. If the children need to be taken somewhere, you will have to divert your trip. At Christmas, what the children want will come first.

The routines of the children will also have an impact on your relationship. Your date will need to be there when they come home from school, get them up in the morning and cook their meals. Bedtimes will be very important, and could make a difference to when you can go out. All these things need to be considered.

NOISE AND MESS

It's no secret that children change the way a house is run. Even if your date has only one child, he or she will have friends. There will be toys around the house, and most of the time, there will be noise, either from music or from children playing. I'm not saying this is bad, but just that it will be there.

If you are thinking about dating a single parent you will need to consider all these things. You might feel that you are up to the challenge. You might have children of your own and be quite used to them. You might think that whatever happens, this date is worth it.

Do take time to think about these things, and if you find that these things aren't important to you, then go ahead and make that date. Be happy!

Learn more about this author, Susan Hibberd.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.