by Genesis H.

Created on: August 25, 2008

Growing up in a family with two siblings, an older brother and a younger sister, I have witnessed the struggles for my mother when it came to the gender differences. This was not for lack of trying on my mother's part. She was a wonderful woman who did the best she could for all three of us.

The problem lies much deeper, which I found out later in life. The issue is not really of question of gender bias as much as it is that we are just different. I am in complete agreement that all people male or female should not be told they cannot do something because of their gender. The harder part of this discussion is how we deal with the actual person emotionally and behaviorally due to their gender.

There are reasons why books and seminars like "Men are from mars, Women are from venus." are so popular. Males in general are very cut and dry and hoping to get to the point of the problem and solve it, while females want to vent for a while and then find the solution. Basically, females have more of an onion quality to them, after 20 minutes of talking through layers of the situation you come to the heart of the real problem.

And of course both are right. Is it then possible for some females to be more like a male and vice versa? Sure it is. We all have our individual chemical marker and personality that should always be taken into effect. But, emotionally we are just different no matter how much we try to fight it.

In my opinion what really plays the biggest part in gender bias has nothing to do with what we can or cannot do because of our gender. It is the small things that make us tick that bring that into play. You usually don't have to worry about your 14 year old son coming home with a 25 year old woman, she is hopefully busy dating guys her own age. But, the 25 year old man who lurks around your daughter is a constant worry. Some things we cannot help as humans to see differently as parents or even bystanders. It is more common for the older man to date your younger daughter so we will notice this before thinking of what your son is doing with his friend's older sister.

For me as a mother the most important thing to me is whether or not my kids are happy with who they are. My 3 year old son sleeps with a baby doll every night, and it was passed down to him from his older brother, and I think it is cute. If my kids come home from school crying or have an argument with the neighbor and that makes them sad it is the same if I did have a daughter, I do my best to make their world the best it can be.

I believe that as long as we are looking out for our kids best interests then gender bias or none things will be okay and we can all be proud mommies and daddies.

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