by Rachelle de Bretagne

Created on: August 23, 2008

The article which follows is taken from personal experience, and is a common sense article aimed at helping those women faced with the dilemma of dating a single dad. There are many aspects which go into making a relationship work, though with a single dad, the differences are very valid ones which can affect your future happiness, and if attention is not paid to approaching the relationship in the correct way, dating may result in disappointment for you, your date and the child or children of that date. When you consider all the people who are in the equation, it is essential to understand how to date without hurting anyone, and understanding the following aspects:

*Approach.
*Priority for the child.
*Sharing love.
*Being flexible.
*Learning not to compare.
*Having confidence in yourself.

Approach.

The guy is good looking, and looks like a great prospect for a date, or even a more long term arrangement. Before jumping in head first, take a look at the situation from the child's point of view.
Not only have they lost their mom, whether through divorce or death, the child is now faced with having to share that one person who forms the whole foundation of any security they have.

Approach is vital. Until that child begins to see you as a possible addition to the family rather than a threat, your relationship with a man who has children will be off to a rough start. They don't want presents or fickle promises. What they want is to know that they are the first priority in their father's life. You are a big grown up person and the child isn't, and giving the child that gift which he needs more than anything else in his/her life, of knowing they are and always will be loved by their dad is essential. Take that away and the child will naturally reject your attempts to have a relationship with their father.

Priority for the child.

When you date a dad, his priority will always be for the child he loves. Trying to compete isn't an option. If you can accept that he is being a human being and a very courageous one in looking after that child's interests, this opens up all kinds of opportunities to get to know the very humane side of the human being you want to date. Watch how they interact with their child, as this will give you clues as to how your potential date deals with their life and the people around them.

Criticism of their parenting methods isn't an option. It's their child and that child deserves priority, though trying to see how you can fit into the picture and enhance the

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