by Denise Fike

Created on: August 18, 2008

I just want to put out there that I'm not saying that EVERYONE's grandparents are a burden. From my experiences though, I honestly believe that mine was. My grandmother was an on again / off again grandmother. She'd feel to the need to take me every once in a while when I was younger, which was fine, but then there would also be some times where she would just rather have nothing to do with me. Now, she is in no way a bad grandmother when she wants something to do with me. But it all just depended on whether she wanted to be a grandmother that day or not. There were times when I would not see or hear from her for over 3 monthes! To me, when your a grandmother, you don't just pop in when you feel like it. Your a grandmother all the time, and your grandkids do eventually figure out that you'd rather be out doing other things than getting to know you, and and I know I always wondered why 'Nana didn't love me as much'. Now, at the age of 20, my grandmother always wonders why I really don't want that much to do with her. Well, I love my grandmother and all, but i'm not too fond of the fact that she would currently rather spend time with her boyfriend's family, than mine. It's currently my mom, my daughter, and I and we pretty much have no family besides her. But to tell you the truth, it feels like she isn't even apart of a this family. I hope other peoples grandparents aren't the same as mine, because there are certaintly times where I wish that I had a grandmother to do things with, but she kind of dug her own hole and she now has to live with it. Not that shes trying to change our relationship anyway. Ok, so maybe I'm a little bitter and biased to this question, but I'm stating from my point of view and experiences. When someone has a grandmother like mine, yes, they are a burden. And the fact that it hurts the kids more than the grandmother just blows my mind. It's sad knowing that you have family, but no one is actually really like a family member to you. Even on the day of my own father's death, my grandmother didn't stay around. She stopped by, gave me and my mother a hug, and then left... to go to her boyfriend's house. To me, that is a little disturbing and upsetting. Technically though, I can also agree that it is not a burden to have a grandparent as a friend, because my mother is a wonderful grandmother to my daughter. She would do anything for her, and spends loads of time with her. I just wish I had gotten the same treatment from my grandmother as my daughter gets from hers.

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