by Teresa Brouwer

Created on: August 17, 2008   Last Updated: August 21, 2008

When I was eighteen, I was pregnant, and by the time I was twenty two, I was the mother of three. As a mother, I always worked around my kids schedule. When they were babies, I worked nights allowing me to be home all morning and afternoon, and when they went to school full-time, I worked days.

Married to an alcoholic husband, he was in and out of work all the time. With a waitress income and dealing with an alcoholic husband, I had no choice but to apply for welfare.

Having three kids, a low-income job, and no money, we hit rock bottom. We lived in a basement apartment with no carpets. It was either no carpets or the street. When I was living with my parents, we visited New York City a lot. I remember seeing homeless people sleeping in doorways of buildings. Never did I think that my life would become seconds away from that lifestyle.

There were times I had popcorn for dinner and I had to scrounge for change inbetween the couch cushions just to buy milk.

When I re-applied for social services, this time it was different. A social worker recommended college. I told her I couldn't afford college, and she told me I would be qualified for full financial aid. I did go to college, and it changed my life completely.

Being poor is no fun, especially when you have children. If I had the choice to choose between a career that would provide shelter, food, and the good things in life for my family or stay home, I would choose a career.

Having a career is also about working for your retirement. Without a good career, there might not be a good pension or a college fund for your child. With the economy today, we need to be rest assured that our future will be taken care of.

Having a career is also about not losing a piece of yourself. Being a successful business person is a great role model for your children. The truth is, family life is a cycle and the way we are as parents will reflect on our children.

When choosing to be a stay-at-home parent, this doesn't mean that a parent is there for their kids. It's not about being there physically as it is being there emotionally. Time management is essential to a good family unity.

According to a new Columbia University survey, teenagers who eat with their families at least five times a week are more likely to get better grades in school and much less likely to have substance abuse problems.

Many people can sacrifice their families for a career. It's about the "quality" of time spent together not the "quantity."

Learn more about this author, Teresa Brouwer.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.