by Tammy A

Created on: August 16, 2008

How do you know when you love someone? How do you know what is love? When you like someone, do you necessarily love them? Is there any difference between the two anyway?

In the secular opinion, love is a feeling. You meet someone, fall in love because of a variety of reasons very quickly & you think you love that person.

But love in that setting is fleeting, albeit not lasting.

It probably sounds cliched to some. I had a hard time trying to grapple with it. We all know of love as the romantic notion we see being marketed on movies & advertisements. Sparks fly in the sky & the sounds of Pavarotti fill the air when we meet the right person or kiss them at the right moment. Then, hand-in-hand, both walk towards the sunset & lived ever after.

If that is the case, why are the divorce cases rising every year? In 2005, the total number of divorce rates* was 5036. By 2007, it has climbed to 5480. That's a big jump in 2 years. That ought to be enough to make one think twice about the notion of love.

Defining Love

If love is what we think it to be, the level of divorce cases should be decreasing instead of increasing. According to Wikipedia, "love represents a range of emotions and experiences related to the senses of affection and sexual attraction. The word love can refer to a variety of different feelings, states, and attitudes, ranging from generic pleasure to intense interpersonal attraction. This diversity of meanings, combined with the complexity of the feelings involved, makes love unusually difficult to consistently define, even compared to other emotional states."

This is a common worldview. However, basing on that definition alone will not be accurate.

I am a christian, so you will think that my view will be biased towards the bible & how the church views love. Before you barf at my theory, please allow me a few moments to place my argument.

To be fair, let us leave religion aside for this section.

When freedom to love was not the norm in the past, marriages were matchmade. Couples had no idea who they had to marry until the fateful day. Our parents may have been united in this manner. Many of these silver-haired couples are still in love with & love each other.

If you ask some of these couples, they will tell you that the initial years weren't the best. After the honeymoon phase', literally, these couples go through a hard time getting used to each other's weird antics & habits. There were times when one of them wanted out. Eventually, they decided to stick it out,

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