by A. D. McDowell

Created on: August 14, 2008   Last Updated: September 23, 2010

To keep intimacy alive in your relationship, you must first know the meaning of intimacy. Too often it is given the association to sex and our sexual connection with our partner. However, intimacy goes beyond the sexual attraction and interactions in a relationship. Once you can define what intimacy is, then you will be able to build it and keep it strong.

Intimacy has many levels. It is the connection that one feels with their partner. It is being able to understand and feel what your partner is going through. To do that, you must be able to empathize with your partner. Intimacy is having the ability to be vulnerable and open with your partner. It is also about being able to know yourself, accept yourself and ultimately expose your inner self to the one you are with.

Friends develop intimacy on an intellectual level. Most relationships start here. You learn about each other's likes, dislikes, cultures and become familiar with them as a person. You build a connection based on things you have in common as well as compatible differences.

Next follows emotional intimacy which is interpersonal. Communication with your partner is vital in building emotional intimacy. You begin to develop feelings for each other. Soon you begin seeing in to the depth of them as an individual. Developing feelings of care and concern, looking out for their best interest and building a supportive connection. Trust is a main component of intimacy. To be open and vulnerable, you have to trust the other person with the feelings and emotions you are willing to share. You must trust them with the inner secrets that make you who you are.

Once emotional intimacy is established, physical intimacy comes in to play. Physical intimacy is beyond just the physical pleasures of sex. It is about the degree of closeness and affection being exchanged. One of the first physical signs of physical intimacy is holding hands and hugging. Allowing some one else into your personal space. Gazing into one another's eyes is also an example. The more you become trusting of your partner, the further the boundaries are pushed aside and the more physical you become. Kissing, caressing, massaging, sexual intercourse, spooning and relaxing together are other forms of physical intimacy.

Now that we've defined what intimacy is, how do we keep it alive in our relationship? Here are a few tips to follow and simple things to keep in mind.

1. Learn to listen to your partner. Actively listen with out interjecting your two

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