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Thoughts about online behavior and etiquette

by John Peter Davis

Created on: August 14, 2008

Top 10 Chat Room Don'ts

We are all born with enough dating common sense to get us through life right? Well you would not think so after watching as many chat rooms and games rooms as I have over the years. Common sense becomes so lacking when hormones are stirred up that I had to create my Top Ten Internet Dating Don't List.

What makes me the expert? Easy question. Over the past twelve years I have seen thousands of people make spectacles of themselves online for a variety of reasons that I have listed below. I have also met very many nice people and watched many relationships blossom.

On a personal note, I have had two long distance relationships of almost five hundred miles each that lasted eight years and almost three years. I am currently on another long distance relationship that I fully expect to last through eternity.

By "internet dating" I mean people getting to know each other, not those looking for the one or two night quickies so to speak. They are on their own.

Let me start with the list. Most of these points apply fairly equally to both sexes.

10. Don't call yourself "Sexmachine69" and expect to be treated seriously. Choose your screen name with some self respect. How many people will want to introduce "Sexmachine69" to his or her mother? On a similar note, don't go on and on about size and prowess. It gets old fast. Those that can, do. Those that can't, brag.

9. Don't make assumptions based on peoples screen names and profiles. Just because a woman shows a thin blonde in a bikini doesn't mean that is how she looks or that she wants to just rip it all off to show you. Profiles are a place to have a bit of fun about oneself and not to be confused with the next point about lying.

8. Don't lie or misrepresent yourself with exaggerated stories like untold wealth or use a grainy old photo that was taken "not long ago." It can make it very difficult later when the relationship progresses.

7. Don't romance someone in England if you are in America and can only afford bus fare across town. Pick your acceptable distance and stick to it.

6. Don't assume "Hi" from a stranger means they immediately want to go to instant messenger and start camming with you. Do not follow "Hi" with a request to IM on Yahoo or MSN.

5. Don't burst into a room with "hi ladies" or "any single guys wanna chat." That is the lasting first impression people have of you. It reveals a bit of your personality don't you think?

4. Don't "poopsie, woopsie, wuv u" talk with your new found loved one in the main chat. It is cute for six seconds at the most to everyone else. Sickening after that. Also don't call everyone hun or luv. When you do find a hun or luv, they won't know it.

3. Don't look desperate. Hold back on "Hi, my name is xxxx. I am lonely and am looking for someone to marry can I phone you now and meet for lunch"

2. Drinking excessively is not a good idea either. Having to always apologize the next day for the things you said doesn't cut it after one or two times tops. And nothing is more annoying than delayed slurring typing. A drunk is only cute to another drunk.

1. Don't make it a full time job to find someone. Do you go to a bar and hand out business cards with your vital information on the back? Relax and enjoy and it will come when it is time. All others will not be the real thing.

To attract cool, you have to be cool.

Learn more about this author, John Peter Davis.
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