CAUTION - this article includes 'sarcasm' & 'irony'; if you are not familiar with these terms, or English humour, please research before reading this article - or you will NOT get the message!
-
Well,quite a start for Paul Emerson Carlyle Ince hey?
From the Guv'nor (though actually no-one ever really called him that at United, knowing it wound him up even more) to the Gaffer to the Goon in 5 weeks. Or is that just a tiny bit unfair? Actually, it's extremely unfair.
So,the peasants are revolting, saying Ince is not a Premiership manager are they? Well, do you know what? He isn't. It's true. He's not -not yet anyway.
He won't become a Premiership manager until Sat 16th August when the season officially starts.
So, the prejudiced amongst us have already decided he's not as good as the last mob then?
Well, again, they're right. This may be news to them, but isn't it logical to expect that if Ince & his brigade were anything like as good as our friends from the Valleys, they'd have been pushing for their jobs? Yes it is, and no they weren't.
So, our famous board, and in particular our MD & Chairman/CE, so respected by their peers, the fans, in fact everyone that's not in any way biased against 'lil ole Blackburn, those Northern oiks who have over-performed so valiantly & battled against their small-town status so arrogantly against our Big Four & London-centric media, have suddenly become a club in meltdown?
What of Everton? A manager who lives within 15 miles of Ewood for the last 10 years, who's seen more there than at Goodison on non-match days, who doesn't want to sign a new contract. Lost two of their unsung heros, one of which was outed by a certain-myopic Frenchman as a serial diver, the other being a Rovers cast-off. No signings to note, not even Alan Smith nor Wagner Love, so buoyantly announced who couldn't find his way for a medical. An aged Hollywood superstar on growth hormones as a celebrity fan who's best mate is on the board, but lost their Chief Executive under a cloud. A failed planning scheme to take their 'peoples club' out of their city, whilst twinning it with a supermarket as they can't afford to build a new ground. Some European city of culture, two great 'Big 6' sides with no pennies to rub together between them - carry on at this rate and they'll be triple-ground-sharing with Tranmere. Back to Everton-only two flair players of any note, one of them is sniffing his paella already in anticipation of a return home (if he ever gets fit) and the other seems unlikely to string five games together. A Chairman who doesn't want to spend any money, yet wants to cash in on any sale. Having to sell players such as Leighton Baines, a 6 million pound left back less than a year ago, because a centre back playing out of position is keeping him out of the side. Star transfer target of the close season? Darren Fletcher, and even he's seemingly having second thoughts.
Rovers play Everton on Saturday, a ground where they've had some odd results over recent season, and no little controversy. Everton were considered the 5th best team in the country last season, and the table agrees. In the same game last season, Rovers gave them a lesson in how to play the game,so much so the crowd actually booed their own side as they couldn't actually get to the ball. That is, until Rovers played their forte play from the last 20 years (and longer) - underestimating the competition and then dropping to their level. Cue Everton sneaking a goal and numerous plaudits from the 'pundits' for a fair result, and Rovers ruefully accepting a draw as a good point, despite really being two points lost.
So herein lies the rub. Rovers, with a new management team in place,supposedly doomed for relegation,under threat of regression, with rumours of mutiny & a self-inflicted embargo, having lost two of their star players, recruited a chicken-pox ridden star playmaker who's at risk of being a Youtube CGI special effects version of Ali Dia from Southampton (the infamous George Weah cousin), a calamity-laden goalkeeper, a Man Utd player who's more famous for his dalliances with a ex-soap star than his footwork, a backroom staff consisting of a crown-green bowling team, and at severe risk of having to recruit the Brockhall groundsmen as all the players will have left, seemingly have everything to prove in this game. It's crucial. Anything less than 32 goals will mean all the Ince dissenters are right, and not only should he be sacked, but anyone even remotely involved in the club should also be sent in exile to Todmorden.
Never in Rovers history has one game meant so much. Not the play-off final, after some 26 years outside the top-flight and numerous collapses via the playoffs, always the eternal bridesmaids. Not the FA Cup Semi Final against Chelsea, or Arsenal,two sides of similar standing, resources and respect in the game. Not the League Cup Final, where Rovers were only making up numbers for the Supreme Spurs to glide to victory. Not the infamous final day in May 95 at Anfield, where Rovers didn't win the Premiership,Man United lost it purely to Andy Cole fluffing his goal chances. Not even the European nights, putting the ignominy of Trelleborgs to bed once and for all. Not even the famous 'Dingle Derbys' of old, a chance to send the cave-dwellers back to their naked breakdancing.
No, all these games pale into insignificance, for one reason. Because no matter what happens in that wild & unpredictable game we know & love as football, where the only certainty is that nothing is certain in football (ask Northern Ireland, Greece in 2004, Scotland in 1953, USA in 1950, etc.), is that if Rovers lose then it just proves Ince as the Anti-Christ.
There will be a Wicker Man on Manxman Hill ready & waiting at tea-time Saturday if it's nothing than a compelling ploating of the Scousers, and even then it will only give him a stay of execution.
However, should Rovers match their result of last season and draw, or - Heaven forbid, Sweet Baby Jesus & the Orphans, - they sneak a win,then we can safely expect 0% credit will be given to Mr Ince in particular. In all likelihood,it will be viewed as a function of how much of a crisis Everton are in that they can let such a ragtaggle excuse of a football side beat them.