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I can see it in their eyes,
as they approach me in that way.
Looking to find the right words,
for a comforting thing to say.
"Please dont ask", my eyes plead with them,
but I know they long to know.
Every moment devoted to keeping my strength.
To say the words would let it go.
My mind taken back to moments before
you lying before me lifeless and blue.
The only breaths that you took
were the ones I gave to you.
Dont ask me how I did it,
how I did not lose control,
how I managed to remain so calm,
the truth is I just dont know.
Can they see it when they look upon us?
With you just lying there.
Can they see that I too am not breathing?
For you are my only air.
Dont ask I tell myself,
questions running through my brain.
Dont ask how I will live without you.
How in this world can I remain?
I dont ask them what is wrong,
I dont ask if you will be okay,
I dont ask if you will come home to me,
for I fear what they will say.
For this moment I will just hang onto you.
I will continue to wear this mask.
My strength will remain resiliant,
just as long as I dont ask.
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