by Ray Burke

Created on: August 12, 2008

21st Century Caveman:

That's me! Not quite the knuckle-dragging behemoth, but a man of my time, my own personal world, and I'm not about to change. I was not nor will be a New Man, a metrosexual or any other trendy label. I just want to be me.

At 40, I should be settled, married with kids, mortgaged to the hilt, juggling a business career, and having nights out with the lads (when permitted by the missus), but that has not been my path. Maybe I don't want the responsibility of commitment or to conform. I've seen what this normal' life does to people and it does not fit me.

I'm no free spirit, I still have to work, but I've never done a normal 9-5 job; whether growing up helping my dad with work, or in the Army, or through university; and I prefer night work. Why am I such a night owl? Do my ideas and writing of articles and stories come more freely with time on my hands after dark? Whatever it is, such unsociable hours in work and life are not always conducive to relationships. Am I selfish, not caring for or listening to anyone else, but myself? I want to find out more about me, by myself. Does it take another to complete someone? Do I dare try and risk losing myself, my independence; my caveman? If I sort myself out, whatever that means, will I be ready to abdicate my caveman throne and relinquish my feelings to someone else? For now, the caveman rules and any woman brave enough to embrace my inner caveman might just be worth it.

I am self-controlled, in check, though positive in outlook, and a perfectionist in my own way. My own universe is a selfish one; no room for anyone else's universe to collide into mine and produce a baby universe as I imagine the real universe does (though I can't speculate on the universe's genitalia!). Do I want to pass on my caveman genes? What is there to look forward to? I don't have the patience or the will to raise a new me, for surely I would want to mould an independent and intelligent mind for the future as a non-conformist who could adapt and hone their talents to anything they wanted to be and do. But I also think of my social gravity and my place within the world. I want to be a facilitator of ideas, sharing my views and thoughts and ways to do things. I want to be different, strive to be different an infovore; collecting knowledge for knowledge's sake- while remaining steadfast-fully me.

My caveman is wary of his inner emotions. I used to be quick to anger in my youth, but as I grew older and wiser, and discovered things

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