Immediate reward for appropriate behavior in early childhood reinforces good conduct and contributes significantly to a preschooler's emotional and cognitive development. A child's earliest lessons about good behavior begin as he watches the activities of adults around him and then mimics what he sees. By receiving positive reinforcement for his efforts, he develops a sense of competency and is more likely to show initiative as he begins to work toward the following three developmental milestones.
1.Developing an internal locus of control; the ability to motivate himself toward future developmental tasks.
2. Gaining the confidence to venture further into the world around him because he has received encouragement for his prior efforts.
3.Building a strong sense of autonomy that is a result of the cumulative successes in learning how to exist apart from caregivers and parents.
In contrast, if a preschooler immediately receives mostly negative reinforcement in the form of "don'ts" and "no-no's" he becomes fearful of trying new things and reticent to model the behaviors of others. Without immediate affirmation, he lacks the empowerment to explore new behaviors and becomes withdrawn and anxious. With a lack of positive reinforcement he will likely fail to achieve the same three developmental milestones. Instead, he his responses will look like these:
1. He will lack an internal locus of control and because of fear, will be unable to motivate himself toward future developmental tasks.
2. Because of lack of self confidence, he will hesitate to venture further into the world and will exhibit signs of insecurity and anxiety.
3. Discouraged because of the lack of immediate positive reinforcements, he will struggle with extreme levels of separation anxiety and will lack a sense of who he is apart from his parents or caregivers.
A small child who receives immediate praise and affirmation for his accomplishments not only feels good about himself but also feels successful at forging connections with those who engage him. He experiences acceptance by caregivers and peers when immediate rewards are given in the midst of positive interaction.
The best forms of immediate reward are those that positively impact a child's sense of self. Tangible rewards, such as toys or candy, should be used sparingly since the small child will focus his delight upon the item and miss the significance of why he has received it. Preschoolers often enjoy stickers and stars but these rewards are temporal and quickly lose their importance.
Rewards that speak the loudest to the heart of a young child include the following:
1. Words of sincere praise and affirmation
These are more than flattery and should not be directed nonspecifically toward the child. "You are such a sweet boy," is not an example of positive affirmation. "Thank you for sharing your cars with your brother. Good job!" communicates sincere praise for a positive behavior that should always be reinforced.
2. Rewards that offer opportunities to further engage in activities with caregivers or with others that he is establishing relationships with
Because Timothy, who is five, has successfully followed the kindergarten teacher's morning instructions to stay in line until his turn, he is allowed to choose the classroom group activity for morning recess.
Instant words of praise and immediate rewards that further engage the child are always the best tools for helping him build both a healthy sense of self and the feeling of capability that comes from personal accomplishment.
A child under the age of six has a short attention span and a small frame of memory. So when rewards are delayed he may no longer understand the relationship between the behavior and its reward. It is important then, for rewards to be given as soon as possible.
A preschooler does not have a developed sense of the passage of time and cannot appreciate a reward that he will not receive until much later. When a three-year-old is told that his reward will happen "tomorrow" he cannot comprehend that he will have go to bed and get up before he is rewarded. He will continue to ask when he is going to get the promised reward. Within just a few minutes he will become upset because his gratification has been delayed, or he will simply forget and move on. Either way, the opportunity to reward good behavior has been lost.
Immediately rewarding positive behaviors is perhaps the most significant form of discipline available. While discipline is often associated with the idea of punishment and correction, it is really the process of conforming behavior to an acceptable standard.
A young child responds better when he is rewarded for good behavior than when he is punished for being "bad." Why? The answer is simple. Punishment simply reinforces that a certain behavior is wrong. Reward teaches the right behavior.
An older child already knows the difference between right and wrong. Punitive measures are sometimes needed to break the will of a child who is determined to do the wrong thing. A small child however, is still in the process of learning what is right and what is wrong. Because he is so impressionable, the question becomes; what is the best way to impress upon him what is right? The answer? First, let him see you doing what is right. The rest is easy. Immediately reward him when he does it too!