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You really like this guy. Maybe you love him. Have you talked about that? Has he said, "I love you." ? Have you said it?

Maybe he's leading you on. Do your friends know him? I'm not saying you have to take him home to meet the family. You do, however, want to have opinions from those you trust. You don't have to listen to all those opinions. It's nice to have more than one, for sure. Not everyone is necessarily going to appreciate Mr. Right. But if everyone thinks he's wrong for you...

You don't want to be alone in this. Of course, in a sense, you are. How could you not be? Entering into a relationship is scary. You will feel vulnerable. To some degree, you probably also feel alone. You might want to cling. Then you want to push away. He behaves similarly. What to do?

You learn a lot about someone watching how that person handles fear. Does he talk about feeling afraid? If neither of you have talked about fear, you don't have enough depth in the relationship to talk about the future.

What games does he play? We all play games. Most of us do, anyway. A lot of those games are not pretty. But we are human and we can be forgiven. How does he react when you call him on a game? While we're at it, how do you react? Can you talk about your feelings without being manipulative?

No one likes to be manipulated. Guys know that talking feelings is a strength for most women. So when a woman starts talking about her feelings, guys cringe. They shy away. BUT, when a woman is willing to be vulnerable and powerful as well in talking about her feelings she knows how she feels and speaks from her heart a guy has to respect that.

Does this make sense? Are you wondering what being manipulative is? The dance in relationships, especially in the beginning, has a lot to do with fear and how willing the two people are to move beyond that fear and beyond the control, manipulation, and games that keep the fear at bay. If you or your guy is not willing to go beyond at least some of that control, you don't have a future, so don't even consider talking about one. If, however, both of you can move beyond your fear and achieve depth, then it's time to talk about the future. A man willing to be vulnerable with you and talk about his feelings and admit to at least some of his fears is a man who you could have a future with. You should have no qualms about broaching that subject.

What constitutes depth? Sex? Not. Guys don't appreciate the tender aspect of sex the same way women do. Though sex is certainly

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