by Talea Jurrens

Created on: August 09, 2008   Last Updated: August 20, 2008

There is a saying that opposites attract. Some theorists would argue that this is a deep seated psychological urge to fulfill a need for completeness. Others would say it's pure animal magnetism. Some would even proclaim that it's pure insanity. Whatever the actual cause may be, it can present an extremely challenging situation when Type A and Type B personalities attract.

My husband & I couldn't fit the profile better. He is a classic Type B personality and I am a self professed Type A. We have been together a little over four years and believe me, we've had our share of frustrations. There have even been occasions where I was ready to throw in the towel and walk away. My husband has never confessed this urge but being a Type B, that's his style. Although this is a good thing, it sometimes make me even more frustrated that he could be so mellow about the whole thing. Realizing that his gentle mannerism is one of the reasons I love him usually makes my annoyance fade. Not to mention the look in his soft blue eyes. Chalk up one vote for the animal magnetism theory.

So how do we make it work? Sometimes I think it's our personality differences that actually do make it work. I couldn't imagine living with another Type A. It takes a mellow, go with the flow kind of guy to appreciate my sometimes demanding and overly impatient self. Learning to understand and appreciate our differences is one of the keys to success.

You are probably thinking that it can't be that simple. You are right, that it's not that simple. Making a Type A and Type B relationship work means not just learning to appreciate our differences but to compliment them. It means that we both realize we are in a partnership together and we can count on each other. Where one of us is weak, the other can pick up the slack. There are things that he is better at and things that I do better. Realizing when to hand over the reins and relinquish control is part complimenting our differences. And it isn't always about control. In certain situations, one of us attends to the task because we enjoy it more. Taking care of each other and supporting one another is another key to success.

We also make it work by finding common ground. This is a key in any successful relationship and not just a Type A and Type B situation. We are proactive in finding things that we enjoy doing together and developing common interests. Setting goals, managing finances and planning for a future together keep us grounded in the real world. The exchange of ideas from each our different personality perspectives helps keep us in check. Spending time together to explore our hopes and dreams allows us to share our own private little world. Here we develop an intimate closeness. Sometimes so close that we are often able to finish each other's sentences or answer questions before they are even asked. To quote my husband, "We vibe Baby." A pretty amazing accomplishment for two people who are so very different.

Leaving you with my final thoughts, I have to say that the biggest key is wanting to make it work. We obviously came together for a reason and are still together for a reason. We both know that the reason is the special and unique gift of our love. Most cherished and much sought after, it is a treasure to behold. A treasure that is worth the extra effort to make our Type A and Type B relationship work.

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