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A guy's view: How to talk about the future

by Jill Jacks

Created on: August 08, 2008   Last Updated: September 08, 2008

It's no secret men and women communicate differently. I don't need a book or psychologist to tell me that. All I have to do is think about the last conversation I had with my friend Len and the one I had with my girlfriend. The conversations were worlds apart. Men like it short and sweet. Women on the other hand seem to have to analize everything to death, slice and dice it to shreds.

I agree some conversations merit more attention than others and in some instances clarification of details is necessary to ensure the anticipated outcome. I don't agree however that I'm not in touch or tune with my feelings simply because I want to keep conversation short and clear. The more you add to conversation the more likely you are to get it wrong in the first place.

Women want to talk about their relationships constantly. They need reassurance as to where it is and where it is going. That's their issue to deal with. They don't understand men don't need that same reassurance. Men know how to let things be as they are. I truly believe men are more accepting of relationships than women are.

As often as you hear how men are quick to want to move the relationship ahead in the beginning (to the sex part) women are as quick to want to move relationships ahead past that point and into permanency. Clearly men and women choose different parts of a relationship as their delicacy of choice.

In all fairness to women some men are slow to get on the bandwagon when it comes time to commit. There are plenty of people out their with commitment issues. I will agree that sometimes a push or cattle prod will be necessary to get your man to move forward and to "discuss" the future.

When negotiations, I mean discussions, become necessary a man might want to first talk to his mother or any other female in general. Women are convinced they have cornered the market on relationship intricacies. Perhaps, I don't know. I do know that when a serious "discussion" is coming my way I try to prepare for it. I know what I like and what I don't. I just have to find how to express this to my girl in a way she'll accept rather than by expressing it in my own simple way.

For example I don't like the idea of Susan moving in right now. I've been informed it's time our relationship moved to the "next level". I have never measured my relationships in levels but rather go with what feels right. I like that instinct.

I swear girls play house right out of the birth canal. I'm certain my sister had a GI Joe in her clenched

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