by Gene De Lalla

Created on: August 07, 2008

Excerpt from A Veteran's Struggle

Jack had one more stop to make at the far end of the Valley where there was a private Vietnam Veterans Memorial set up by the father of a soldier killed during the 1968 Tet Offensive. The parents of the slain soldier made the memorial to their son accessible to the public during certain times of year, Christmas being one of those times.

Even though Jack did want to see the memorial, he had mixed emotions since he would have to re-visit times that were painful to him, to say the least. But he did not want to pass up the opportunity to pay his respects to one of his brothers who paid the ultimate price as well as to speak to the soldier's parents during the Christmas season. Sandi, too, knew that it was important for Jack to make this visit, but she was unsure if Jack wanted to go it alone, or have the family with him.

The question in Sandi's mind was quickly answered without even asking, as Jack did want his family with him to share the memories and maybe, just maybe, some tears.

It was about 11 am and snowing moderately as Jack and crew crawled into a four-wheeled-drive Jeep to make the 20-minute trip to reach the small ranch-style home. The memorial was about one hundred feet or so to the left of the home with the snow-clad evergreens backed by the beautiful Sawtooth Range - a fitting resting place for the fallen soldier.

The memorial itself was simple, yet powerful in its beauty and profound in its message in honoring those fallen in battle. But there is no memorial that can adequately express the love and sorrow of parents for their son, though this tiny salute came very close.

Jack exited the Jeep first, with Sandi, Andrew and Yaleen following in quick succession. Sandi and the children could already see the affect on the ex-Air Force Security Police Non-commissioned Officer perimeter defender, as he reached into his pocket to pull out a handkerchief to soak up tears that had began to well-up in his eyes. They stood several feet from Jack, not wanting to interfere in his silence and meditation on things and brothers from forty years ago, knowing that some of his comrades never made it back home.

Jack stood there in the cold and snow and started to shiver a bit as his emotions got the better of him. After about a minute, Sandi and the children went over to him to sympathize - but still unable to empathize - surrounding the man that they loved with hugs and kisses. At this point, Jack was unable to hold back and started to cry like a baby.

The children didn't quite know what was going on or what to do except continue to hug and kiss their dad. Sandi did not want the children to see their dad cry, but Jack, in a broken voice, whispered that it was good for children to see a man cry.

Although Jack did want to meet the soldiers' parents, he changed his mind due to his emotional state, said several prayers and left a sizeable donation to help with the upkeep of the private memorial.

After several minutes, Sandi said "Jack, let's go now," tugged at his arm, then gently caressed his hand and led Jack and the children to the Jeep to head back to the lodge. She relieved Jack of driving duties for the time being so he could relax a little and privately contemplate this heartrending encounter.

It seems that even four decades of time had not dulled the memories of this once-warrior, now father and husband.

Learn more about this author, Gene De Lalla.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.