by Amber Hulsberg

Created on: August 07, 2008

Dating is a game. Sad as it may be, it is very true. Think of it as one big game of "Clue." Instead, of finding out that the killer is "Miss Scarlett" in the library with the rope, you are trying to find "Miss or Mr. Right" in the here and now with the key to your heart. To survive in the dating field you must have a strategy to weed through the wrong ones, to protect yourself from physical or emotional harm, and keep them. Every single person has some idea of what kind of person they want or need. Now it may not be a realistic view, considering as you get older and life happens your opinions and desires change. Regardless, a person sets up certain standards that someone has to meet before you invest yourself and your time.

Those standards are what people say is "their type." As cliched as it may sound, people do have a type. You may find yourself attracted to someone physically that someone else may not. Physical attraction is the first and most important attribute in the dating field. Sound shallow? Maybe, but if you do not have a physical attraction, or chemistry, to a person everything else will begin to fizzle out. Then there is compatibility. Do you get along? Does he/she make you laugh? Do you like the same music? Can you talk openly to each other? Do you have the same morals/ethics/outlook on life? If you and the person clash on important issues....again the relationship will have no future. Now finding someone you get along with and that you are attracted to is not difficult. Finding that person you is single, makes it a little more complicated. Or finding that person who is at the same stage in their life who is ready for a "relationship" and a commitment...or not also makes things a little more complicated. It all takes a strategy.

Now whether you have a "scene" to pick up prospective candidates or if you just go with the flow, you will have a method of baiting them. Is it pick up lines? Is it being charming or flirty? Everyone has a method they use to attract or catch the attention of another. Then you have a mental checklist you use when you go out on the first date. Did he come to pick you up on time? Was she ready when you arrived? Did they ask for or offer any imput to the planning of the date? Were they accomodating? Did they have or do any of those "pet peeves" you can't stand? Did they expect or offer sex right away? Talk about ex's or themselves? Were they interested in you? Now, of course, you will not get all the answers to that mental checklist

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